Sore Feet

I read somewhere that as you get older you lose padding on the bottom of your feet. Can you believe that? Now, trust me, Grammy G has lots of fat she could lose all over her body. But I never wanted to lose fat from the bottom of my feet. Guess that explains why I need to buy cushions for my shoes. Another of those strange things about getting old.

They really wear that sweet grandbaby out at day care. I was lucky enough to be able to pick her up from day care yesterday. I got that sweet smile of hers when I got there but she was falling asleep by the time I was buckling her into the car seat. Such a sweet baby. Bosco went crazy when I carried her into the house. He just couldn't understand why he couldn't kiss her when we got there. Finally after about an hour I let him nudge her some and I started loving on her. We were able to ease her awake and she woke up with a smile on her face. Then the fun began. We got to play. She loves her new baby doll. Luckily I remembered to pick it up because Bosco loves it too. Unfortunately, his love is a little more distructive than hers.

The only time she was unhappy was when I wouldn't give her one of Bosco's goodies. I finally had to give Bosco one of her animal crackers and then give her one. She gave her first one to Bosco to make sure they were eating the same thing and then took one for herself. Boy that dog eats well when she's around.

Friends

Grammy G is so lucky. I have wonderful children but my children have wonderful friends.

Last night as I was standing at the refrigerator trying to figure out what to cook, my wonderful daughter called. She told me that my precious granddaughter missed her Grammy and that their friends had included me in their invitation to go to dinner. How sweet is that? I couldn't say no. Especially when my bug missed her Grammy. I petted old Bosco and was out the door. When I pulled up all the kids were in the front yard. Serif got the biggest grin on her face when she saw her Grammy drive up. That definitely made my day.

We had such a nice visit. Missy's friend Marissa is getting ready to leave for Las Vegas to attend her brother's wedding. How exciting. Two young people getting ready to start their lives together. I know it's going to be a joyous occasion for everyone. I even gave Marissa some quarters from me to play in the slot machine. Hey, I'll try anything.

This afternoon I get to pick Serif up from day care. How exciting. I can't wait for this work day to be over. I will take her home with me and her parents can get her after their appointment. I have a list of everything that I'm supposed to remember from the school. Hope I remember everything. Once I get my hands on that baby, everything else just goes out the window.

Monday

It's already Monday. I can't believe that the weekend is already over. There just aren't enough hours in the weekend for me.

Last night a cold front came into Austin. Now here in Austin cold fronts are different than in other areas. It meant that the temperature went down to the 50's during the night and the high is supposed to be around 85. After over 100 degree temperatures all summer that's down right cold.

I love the cooler nights. It feels so good to snuggle into the bed and be all comfy and warm. Of course right when you get to the good comfy the alarm goes off and it's time to get up and get ready for a new week of work. Don't get me wrong, I love my job and the people I work with. I just wish I could work like say from 10-5. At full pay of course. Then I could sleep in and get up when I feel like it.

I had such a nice weekend. It's so boring but just the way I like it. We had family night on Friday night. Patti has been having problems with her medication so she couldn't make it. We all met at Missy's house and had a nice visit. We sat around the table and ate some pizza and then played a game. It was a short night because everyone was tired after a busy week at work. Plus it had been a more emotional week that usual.

Saturday I had a Daughter of the King meeting in the morning. In the evening the kids came by and surprised me with dinner. We sat and watched Gray's Anatomy. The kids couldn't watch it so I recorded it so we could all watch it together. I love my DVR. The plan was for me to take care of bug for a couple of hours but she would have nothing to do with that. She was determined that she was going home with mommy and daddy. As they drove away, she had that grin on her face. The one that said yup I got my way. She is so much like her mother at that age.

After the kids left, my best friend called to chat. We love to sit and compare stories about our grandchildren. Of course she has more stories to tell since she as three grandchildren and I only have the one. Since I had my precious Serif spend the night with me, she decided it was time for her Layla to spend the night with her granny. Apparently they had a fantastic time too. That is so special. I can't wait until mine will spend the night with me again.

Sunday is our usual shopping day. The grocery store is lots more fun when we go as a family. Makes it go by faster. First we went to Target to get Emily her birthday presents. I think I got some things she will like. I sure hope so. I still can't believe she's going to be 10 years old. Then it was off to the grocery store.

Toddlers are so funny. Last weekend Serif couldn't get enough of me. This weekend she wanted nothing to do with me. Oh I got a quick kiss and she let me hold her for a little while but she really wanted her mommy and daddy this weekend. That's okay. I'll be patient. Maybe next weekend she'll want to be with me again.

Wonderful Children

I honestly don't know how I could have gotten through yesterday without my wonderful children and my precious grandbaby. They are my link to my wonderful Patrick.

For some reason this has been a hard year for both my kids. As I have said before, perhaps we feel the loss more because of our precious little girl. I am so sorry he can't enjoy her the way I can.

I was able to spend the day with Missy and Serif. We had lunch with Tom and Terry and then we girls headed to the mall. I was surprised that I was able to find some shoes for me. That definitely brightened a dreary day.

After work we all got together and went to the lake. The drought was really obvious. The lake was down so low. But it was beautiful out there. I am always happy when we can go there. It's so much nicer than a graveyard. Serif got to see the fish swimming in the lake. It was lovely and peaceful and I think it helped everyone.

When we left the lake, we all went out to eat. It was nice sitting around a nice big round table with my family around me. I was so thankful that I was able to be with them. Of course Serif kept us all entertained.

The depression is lifting. It felt good to go to work today. I pray that Missy's depression will leave her soon too. I know that this is hard on her. I wish I could help her but all I can do is be there if she needs me.

Patrick will always be missed. But he is part of us and he is always in our thoughts and in our hearts. Life still goes on and I plan to do a lot of living before I join him. Afterall, there's a grandbaby to spoil.

How Long?

So how long do your mourn your one true love? Is it a year, two years, an eternity?

Tomorrow my wonderful husband will be dead 9 years. That is a long time to mourn. I get mad at myself for missing him so much. I figured okay 1, 2, maybe even 3 years this day would be hard but who thought it would still hurt so much 9 years later.

True, I don't pine for him daily. I do think of him almost daily. Happy thoughts of our times together. Even an occassional thought of not so happy times together. I do talk to him almost every day. But I don't think I'm hanging on to him in an unhealthy manner.

We had almost 25 wonderful years together. Like any couple we had our good times and our bad times. I have to admit that the good times definitely out numbered the bad. Patrick was a very loving and giving man. He loved his family more than life itself. There was nothing he wouldn't do for any of us. He left behind a legacy of love that we will all cherish.

Don't get me wrong he had his faults. He was human and he was a man. Needless to say there were days I could have throttled him. But in the end we had a wonderful friendship. We loved to talk and laugh. I remember those talks that would start after the kids went to bed and lasted until the wee hours of the morning. I remember having a bad dream and having him there to hold me when I reached out to him.

Maybe it's seeing his grandchild growing into such a little person and seeing bits of him in her. Maybe it's knowing how much he looked forward to being a grandfather and the fact that he is missing this beautiful child. Maybe it's remembering all the plans and hopes and dreams that we had for our golden years that will never be.

Tomorrow I will spend time with our children and grandchild. They are a piece of him and our love that will live on. Yes he is gone physically but he is so in my heart that he is never far from me.

On this the anniversary of his death, I will remember his wonderful smile, his gentle caress, his wonderful kiss and gives thanks for the years we had and try not to think of the years we aren't going to have.

Slumber Party

I can't believe it has been so long since I last blogged. I definitley need to do something about that. I have been very lazy lately.

This weekend was a special treat for Grammy G. My sweet grandbaby spent the night with me. This was the first time she has slept away from her mommy and daddy. I was so excited to be the one.

I was all prepared. I went to the store and got one of those rails for my bed and installed it on Saturday morning. On Friday night I went to the store and got milk and some goodies for us. She is a picky eater so I got things I new she liked. I always have animal cookies for her but I needed some ice cream and gold fish. She does like her gold fish.

As usual, she didn't want mommy and daddy to leave but once they left there were no problems. We went outside and played a little and read books and hugged and kissed and she played with her toys. We sang and talked. She was such a sweet happy little girl. Then around 10:30 she just walked over to me and put up her arms. I picked her up and she laid her head on my shoulder. She patted my back a couple of times and went right to sleep. I put her in my bed and I crawled in with her.

Poor Bosco, my sweet old lab, was not sure what to make of this. Her parents were supposed to come and get her. I am his mommy and he doesn't like to share. He loves her but he's a bit jealous. Actually he's a lot jealous. He must have come over to check on me three different times during the night. I guess he wanted to make sure I still loved him most.

She slept so good. I was constantly waking up and checking her. That's normal since it was the first time and I'm not used to having someone in my bed. She stirred a little around 6:20 but didn't wake up until 8:30 in the morning. I was so lucky. She wasn't sure what to make of everything when she woke up in my bed and saw me. There was a surprised look on her face and then after I sang her a good morning song she smiled at me.

In the living room I put on some oldies music and she and I danced and sang as we got ready to greet the day. That baby does like good music. She was so happy. I got her some milk and she helped me get Bosco fresh water. These days Bosco is jealous when she gets something to eat and she gets jealous if Bosco gets one of his goodies. Each wants what the other is having. Just like a couple of little kids.

I had gotten some muffins for her breakfast. She would go over to the dining room chair and pat on it. I would then sit down and put her on my knee and she would eat. Why talk when all you have to do is point, pat or grunt. Right?

Then it was more dancing and playing with toys. Around 10 o'clock I thought she wanted to talk to her parents so I called them. They were doing great without her and were sleeping. Apparently it wasn't them she wanted to talk to because she just went on playing when they were on the phone.

The kids arrived around 11:30 to a big smile from their baby. She was so happy to see them. After some visiting we headed out to the church. This was my day to deliver altar flowers. I am happy to say that the one delivery we were dreading (the 14 months old little boy in Children's Hospital) had been sent home and we were thrilled to send some flowers to him through his grandma. The rest of the fowers were left at a nursing home to help brighten the place for those staying there.

The kids took me to lunch in payment for baby sitting. Silly them. I thought that's what all the bug kisses were for. Apparently Grammy time wasn't over because that sweet grandbaby wanted to be on my lap and eat some my lunch which I was more than happy to share.

Then we went shopping. She was so good and I got lots of hugs and kisses throughout the day. A fact that was pointed out many times by her mother. I couldn't believe how lucky I was. We wore that poor baby out. She was asleep before we hit the grocery store and slept through the entire grocery store.

By the time I got home I was exhausted. It had been a long day and I'm not used to picking up and holding 20 pounds of love so much. My back and arms definitely felt it. The poor dog was just dragging. After a few phone calls, Bosco and I were off to relax in our beds. He was spread out snoring in his dog bed before I ever got into my bed. I have to admit I didn't watch much television before I went to sleep.

Shortly after I got into bed, the thunder and lightning started. It was wonderful. We are so dry and my poor yard needed the rain so badly. I love laying there listening to the rain on the roof. What a wonderful way to fall asleep after such a perfect weekend.

Thanks, kids, for sharing your wonderful precious daughter with me. It meant the world.

Vacation Pictures

Okay so we are home and everyone is back on schedule. The pictures are developed from the trip and life goes on as normal. There is one problem. As I sit and scan the hundreds of pictues taken, one thought keeps going on over and over in my mind.

Who the hell is the fat old lady holding my granddaughter?!!!

I guess it's true that we never see the real us when we look in the mirror because I swear I have never seen that old lady before. But that same face and body keeps showing up. What is going on here?

In case you haven't guessed, part of the problem is that I have had another birthday. Normally birthdays don't bother me but, as I am getting closer and closer to 60, they are starting to bug me more and more.

So what is the solution here. Well I could start lying about my age, but I really don't think that would help.

I could go on a diet and lose a bunch of weight. The problem with that is that my fat and my body have become so close over the years that I notice they have a strong attachment to each other. They hold on to each other closely. If I could convince them to part ways, I would like to lose about 100 pounds. That would make me a chubby grandmother. Not bad. I could live with chubby grandmother. Then the kids wouldn't have to get an extra large coffin for me either. Then when I looked at my pictures I'd be older, skinnier and saggier. Not sure about that either.

So here's my solution. While I contemplate another diet and how to make my life more miserable. I know it's not a diet it's a lifestyle change.

Anyway, back to the subject...From now on my children can hold the image of me in their hearts because there will be NO MORE PICTURES OF ME!

There that takes care of the problem for now. I can live with that.

Home Again

We are home from our wonderful vacation. Everything was great. I loved being with my family enjoying all the California sights.

I am a cancer so going to the coast in San Diego was wonderful. I loved standing there and looking out into that beautiful ocean while the tide rushed over my feet.

The zoo was fun and Serif loved the polar bears. They put on a good show for her. We wore ourselves out though.

Then it was off to Disney Land. We spent the afternoon we arrived in Downtown Disney. The next day was half of Disney Land. Then there was the California Adventure and our last day was the rest of Disney Land.

We went on lots of rides. I had a ball. Kathy, Terry's mother, took me on my very first every roller coaster. I even have a picture to prove it. It was great and I am sure that one day I will do another. I loved the Haunted Mansion. That was where Serif waved to the ghosts. So many rides and so many memories. It was awesome.

This was not one of those laid back relaxing vacations. We were on the go from the first day. We would start out in the morning and not stop until it was time for bed. My poor feet had no idea what I was doing to them.

When we got back Tom had made hot dogs and hamburgers and brought them over to celebrate the 4th. We had a wonderful family celebration that ended with fire works in the front yard. It was after midnight when I finally crawled home. I was totally exhausted.

The next day was spent in bed and resting on the sofa trying to get my poor swollen feet to get back to a fairly normal size. Boy it sure was hard to get up and go to work on Thursday. Luckily it was only a 2 day week. I'm going to enjoy this weekend.

I cannot tell you how great Serif was on this trip. That baby was so good. Here she was away from home being dragged everywhere and off her usual schedule but you wouldn't have known it. She was so good and seemed to really enjoy herself. I hope she remembers some of it. Luckily her mother took hundreds of pictures to remind her.

Tom did a great job taking care of the house for me. Bosco was in good shape but I think he missed me because he wouldn't leave my side on Wednesday. He was right there even when I went to the bathroom. Poor puppy was so unhappy when I had to go back to work. He's going to be happy when we get back into our old routines this weekend.

We are so fortunate that we have a family that can spend 6 days together without any problems. Everyone got along wonderfully. It was a vacation full of love, laughter and memories. It's a vacation I will cherish always. Thank you Missy and Terry.

Busy Bee

I can't believe that this is Monday and we leave for California on Wednesday. Time is really getting short and there is so much to do.

It was a jam packed weekend. It started on Friday night with the family getting together. I was able to give Tom all the last minute isntructions for while I am gone. I am so fortunate to have a son who is willing to house sit and take care of my puppy. Between him and the neighbors everything should be taken care of. Bosco won't even know I'm gone.

I got up on Saturday and did my cleaning. Then I got to take care of my wonderful granddaughter for a few hours so her mommy and daddy could get some cleaning done at their house without a little one under foot. She and I had so much fun. She is so active now. You spend a lot of time running after her. I love the way she stops and looks back to make sure you are there. She was fascinted with my bedroom this time. She discovered the nightstand and loved getting all the books out and looking through them. We would sit and talk while she sorted through everything. My goodness that little girl can move. After much talking and laughing it was time for a nap. She just came up to me and put her arms up to be picked up. When I lifted her up she laid her head on my shoulder and went to sleep. Can anything be more precious? We both had a nice little nap and then mommy and daddy showed up to take her home. I had such a wonderful time with her and Bosco was so good with her. He really does love her. He's just happy when she goes home.

Then Sunday was running around and getting the last of the stuff. I still have some things to pick up but most of the stuff is finished. I even got a few things put in the suitcase. I still can't believe we're going.

Guess it's time to make my final list of things to do. With my memory, a list is a must.

Shoes

Who would have thought that finding a comfortable pair of walking sandals could be so difficult. Missy and I have been trying to find shoes for our vacation. We needed something that would be comfortable and let us walk for all the hours need for the San Diego Zoo and Disney Land. That isn't that much to ask.

So on Saturday afternoon we set off on our journey. We started at our usual place...Target. We want good shoes but we don't want to necessarily pay a lot for them. After wandering around and making several purchases, we emerge shoeless. So it was onto the mall. We went to every department and shoe store in the mall. Looking and not finding. It was very discouraging. We actually found ourselves in a time warp. We both figured it was around 5:00 but when I looked at my watch it was 7:15. We could not believe it. We left the mall tired, discouraged and shoeless.

On a brighter note I must say that I have the most wonderful granddaughter in the whole world. She put up with all that time in the mall like a real trooper. She walked around a little but spent most of the time in her stroller just singing along as we shopped. She was such a good girl.

I have to admit that I was very discouraged. I was so afraid that I would not find what I was looking for to wear on the trip. I knew I could get some tennis shoes but I really wanted some sandals. It is going to be hot and I didn't want to fool with socks and such. I know I can be a bit picky.

On Monday Missy suggested we go to REI and see what they have. So we take our lunch hour on Tuesday and head out shoe shopping again. I couldn't believe that we walked in and I found exactly what I wanted. Even though I tried on other shoes, the first ones were the ones I got. I love them and have been wearing them to make sure they are comfortable for the trip. Unfortunately, Missy's aren't as comfortable and will have to take hers back. I have faith she will find what she wants when she exchanges them. Okay I spent a little more than I wanted but they are so worth the money and will definitely last forever. Plus my feet seem to really like them. So that is one more thing to take off the list.

So I guess the moral of this story is not to give up. What you are looking for is out there. You just have to keep looking. Hope that's true about bags. That's the next thing on my list.

Father's Day

Sunday is Father's Day. Missy has a great day planned in celebration of Terry's second year as a father. He really is a great father. He deserves a special day.

It used to be that I hated Father's Day. After lossing both Patrick and my father within 6 months of each other, Father's Day was just a reminder of what I didn't have. I still miss them both terribly but life goes on. They are in a better place and I'm here with a precious little girl.

So, the present is bought and everything is ready to celebrate the newest father in our family. I hope his day is as special as he is.

Happy Father's Day Terry. And Happy Father's Day to all the father's out there both young and old.

Party Time

What a full weekend I had. I am dragging this Monday morning but it was worth it.

First of all, I got to babysit my sweet grandbaby on Saturday afternoon while her parents got ready for the party. What fun we had. We went outside and looked around. We took a little nap and then we played. Then her mommy and daddy came to get her and, along with her uncle Tom, we all went out for a great dinner. Everyone was in good spirits and we had a wonderful time.

Sunday was a busy day. I had to go to the grocery store alone. That was strange. I don't usually do that. Usually it's a family affair. I did miss my girls while I was there but Missy called and we chatted. Yes, I was one of those ladies going through the grocery store with a phone to her ear.

I went over to help the kids get ready for the party. (They called. I wouldn't have gone over if they hadn't. I'm not THAT kind of a mother.) I watched the baby while they did some last minute cleaning. Then Kathy came over and we filled up the balloons while Tom and Patti did the crepe paper. It was lots of fun. Before we knew it the house was filling up. I can't believe how many people came. There were kids running every. It was perfect. Of course, there were a few tantrums here or there but overall the kids were really good. She had no idea what was going on. She just kept walking around.

Tom and Patti got her the neatest piano. It's a prefect little minature red piano. It is just darling. Lots of clothes and books. At this age, they have no idea about getting things. She was not interested at all in opening presents. She was more interested in all the big kids running around.

The party was supposed to be from 3-5. I think the last family left around 9:00. That is the sign of a successful party. Missy and Terry worked so hard on everything and it showed. Their house looked great and the decorations were perfect.

Tom, Patti, Marissa, Aaron, Missy, Terry and I sat around after everyone left just relaxing. It was wonderful sitting back and just visitng for a little while. Before we knew it, it was after 10:30. I finally got home a little after 11. Exhausted but happy. I do have to admit that it was hard to get up and get going this morning but it was well worth it.

Serif had a first birthday that will be remembered by family and in pictures for years to come. It was a perect way to celebrate her first year.

TGIF

It's Friday and I can't wait for the weekend. Not only for the sleep which I am really looking forward to but it's also the big birthday party for our new one year old. There will be lots of friends and family gathering on Sunday to enjoy my sweet granddaughter. It's going to be lots of fun.

Last night best friend called to talk about grandbabies. She has three and, just like me, never tires of chatting about them. I answer the phone and hear: "Is this the grammy of a one year old!" That started it and, except for an occassional stray to our health, the total conversation was about how fortunate we are to have these wonderful creatures in our lives. She leaves on Saturday to go to the beach with all of her grandchildren for the week. I'm so happy for her. This is a special time for them. We are so fortunate that we have children who include us in our grandchildren's lives.

I am desperately trying to get everything ready for our trip to California on the 28th. I have noticed that as I get older I want to get things done early. I don't like running around at the last minute. I want everything done and out of the way so I can leisurely take care of things. I got some clothes. (You must have new clothes for a vacation.) Now I am on the lookout for a bag to carry on the plane. No luck yesterday but I have not given up. The bag I want is out there. I just have to find it. Until then, I will keep looking.

Have a great weekend.

It's Been a Year

The party was a wonderful success. I still can't believe it's been a year. Serif knew she was the center of attention and loved every minute of it.

I have to admit that since I had given her the bear the night before, I had to stop by the store and get something for her. The baby had to have something to open up from her grammy on her birthDAY. I got her a cute little phone. She loved it. She was pressing buttons like mad.

Missy made her birthday cake. She did a fantastic job on it. It was beautiful and tasted great. Serif did a great job with the cake. Not too messy but messy enough. She did get it in her hair and on her parents. I'm sure she was wondering why everyone was sitting around watching her eat. She has no problem being the center of attention.

Shortly after Terry's family left, Tom and Patti arrived. Serif was so funny. Patti put the bag with her presents on the floor and while we were talking Serif pulled out one the the presents. It took a little encouragement but she learned how to open a present. She loved her presents from Uncle Tom and Tanta.

It was a wonderful evening with family. There was lots of love and laughter. What a wonderful way to celebrate the first year of a wonderful little girl.

Happy Birthday

Today my sweet grandbaby turns one year old. I cannot believe it. Where has the year gone? She is such a big girl now. She holds on to your finger and just walks you everywhere.

Last year at this time I was sitting and waiting to have my driver's license renewed. Everyone sitting around knew that my granddaughter was going to be born that afternoon. I was so scared/excited. I was worried about my darling daughter having a c-section and that everything with her and the baby would be okay and I was so excited about this new experience that was waiting for me. The experience of being a grandmother. I had no idea the love and happiness that the next year would bring me.

I followed the kids to the hospital. They got ahead of me for a little while, but luckily there were no cops around, and by doing a little 75-80 I caught up with them. Then began the waiting. Luckily I was able to be in the room with her before the c-section. The doctor was late so we all sat around and talked about how hungry Missy was. I remember standing out in front of the surgery with Terry while they were prepping Missy for her surgery. The doctor came out and I told him to take good care of MY baby. He just smiled and patted my shoulder and assured me that everything would be fine.

I hate waiting but everyone was so sweet. They brought a chair out for me to sit by the nursery so I could see the baby as soon as she came in. It wasn't long before I saw Terry arriving with my beautiful granddaughter. I could feel Patrick there with me as we looked at her for the first time. She was so beautiful.

I wasn't totally happy until I finally saw my baby. She was so happy as she held her baby. It was so wonderful to watch. They were both well. All my prayers had been answered.

It had been 28 years ago that I laid in a hospital bed in that very same hospital and given birth to my baby girl. I knew the happiness that Missy was feeling. I knew the love that she was feeling for this beautiful new baby that she was holding. Until that moment I had no idea that I could love a baby as much as I had loved Missy. I found out about a grandmother's love that day. It is strong and it is pure.

The only thing missing was my wonderful Patrick. I could feel his presence and I knew he was as proud and happy as I was. I see so much of Missy in Serif. I see so much of Patrick in Missy.

Last night I couldn't wait and I gave Serif her birthday present. It sounds very vain but I gave her a Grammy Bear. I went to make a bear and made it for her. I put my voice in it. I wanted her to know that I am close to her no matter what. That if something should ever happen to me, she will have that bear to remind her, not only of my voice, but the love that I have for her.

Tonight will be her first birthday cake. No cutting it up in small pieces for her. It will be the typical first birthday cake that is presented to the baby in celebration of her first year. She will be able to get her hands in it and eat or spread as she wants. We will all sit and remember last year at this time and say our prayers of thanksgiving.

Happy Birthday Serif. I love you.

Mother's Day

Oh my goodness. I can't believe it's been so long since I last blogged. I really need to get better about this.

I want to share my wonderful weekend. It was so fantastic. I have the greatest children and children-in-law in the whole world.

Saturday was spent sleeping in and then meeting my kids for a wonderful brunch.The food was delicious and everyone was in good spirits.

I can't tell you what it feels like to sit at the table and look around at your children all grown up. I felt such a wonderful sense of happiness and satisfaction. They have grown into such wonderful adults. People that I would be proud to have as friends not just my children. Sitting there looking at these young adults and thinking back to when they were growing up. All of the frustrations, heart aches and worry were so worth it. They have grown up to make their mother proud.

After a nice relaxing lunch, I went home to rest up for the adventure ahead of me. Yes I was going to baby sit so my wonderful daughter and son-in-law could have a romantic evening of dinner and ballet. I was ready to spend some quality time with my adoreable granddaughter. I got there early so mommy and daddy would get ready for their date. Granddaughter was a little fussy because of a couple of teeth that are coming through on top. So, of course, mommy gave her some tylenol to make her feel better. It worked. She was happy and fun by the time they left at 6:30.

We played with some toys and everything was going well. Suddenly she got hungry so we sat on the sofa and had some of her bottle. There she was half sitting with her head on my shoulder drinking her bottle. I was just chatting away with her, when I looked down and she was sound asleep. Already. Okay so I figured she would sleep a little and then we would play. I held her close and kissed on her and played with her fingers and toes. All the normal things you do when a baby is sleeping in your arms. The time passed and she wasn't waking up. So around 9:00 I laid on the sofa and snuggled her close. We both ended up asleep. She woke up around 11:00 and wanted some more bottle but never really woke up. She was still sleeping soundly when her mommy and daddy arrived home around 12:30. She slept almost the whole time I was babysitting. Of course she woke up shortly after I left so that she could keep mommy and daddy awake.

After such a busy evening, I had a very relaxing Sunday morning. I have been so bad about going to church lately. I defintely have to get myself back on track.

Sunday afternoon was spent with the whole family. It was so much fun. It always is when we all get together. We just visit and play games. Since my wonderful son couldn't make the party, he called to wish me a happy Mother's Day. Both of my children are so thoughtful.

We all brought food so there was plenty to eat. Beautiful granddaughter was the center fo attention. She was sleeping when I got there. It was so sweet when she woke up and just wanted her Grammy to hold her. Of course, I had to force myself to comply with her wishes. I love when she first wakes up. She is so cuddly and snuggly.

We went out to see the rest of the family. Soon she was fully awake and showing everyone what a great dancer she is. She is so cute to watch. She just bounces up and down and swings that little arm. She entertained us with her dancing for a while and then she furniture walked to the end of the coffee table and put her arms out to me. I put my hands out and as she started toward me I pulled them back a little. Before we knew it, she had taken 3 whole steps toward me. I can't believe that she walked to me. What a big girl she has become and my fantastic son-in-law got it all on tape. What a wonder Mother's Day present. It was so perfect. She didn't walk any more but I didn't care. That was all I needed.

As usual, my darling daughter gave me a very wonderful and thoughtful Mother's Day present. I love the Willow Tree Angels. She got me the "Thank You" one. That and a beautiful card that she wrote a very special message on. She got what she wanted. She made me cry. It was such a beautiful and thoughtful present. Between my grandbaby walking and my wonderful daughter, it was a perfect day.

On the way home, I stopped by the grocery store and did my weekly shopping. By the time I got home I was ready to relax and get ready for the week ahead. It was such a wonderful weekend. I am so blessed with my family.

Later, best friend called and we had our weekly granny chat. It's so fun to share all our news about our wonderful grandchildren. What a wonderful way to end a great weekend.

I hope that all of the mother's out there had a very special day yesterday. And for those of you who didn't have their mother's with them. Know that their love is with you always.

Easter

Anyone who knows me knows that I am a devout Christian. No I am not a "bible thumping" Christian. I am one of the quiet believers. I will talk about it if you ask, but I am not pushy about it. Many other Christians believe that is wrong but I'm pretty laid back about everything including my religion. I'm the type that as the debate is going on all around me, I just sit back and quietly believe. I have always believed.

I have had bad things happen to me in my life. The hardest was the death of my husband. I remember the pain so much. I had never realized that is was a physical pain. I felt the pain of my heart breaking. But during that time my faith kept me going. My husband was also a deeply religious man and I knew he was at peace.

I have been fortunate that I have so much more good than bad in my life. I believe it is very important to take time to say thank you during the good times. Everyone turns to God when things are bad, but do you stop and thank him every day for all the good things that are happening? I hope so. I believe that is very important.

So why am I on my soap box today? Because this is the holiest of times. This is Lent and Easter is approaching. Everyone is coloring their Easter eggs and getting their pretty new Easter outfits. I hope everyone will take a moment to say thank you for the candy and the new clothes. I hope that everyone will take a minute to remember why we are even having this celebration.

Here is something I heard the other day that you might enjoy as you eat your jelly beans you get from the Easter Bunny.

The Jelly Bean Prayer

Red is for the blood He gave
Green is for the grass He made
Yellow is for the sun so bright
Orange is for the edge of night
Black is for the sins we made
White is for the grace He gave
Purple is for His hour of sorrow
Pink is for our new tomorrow
A bag full of jelly beans colorful and sweet,
Is a prayer, is a promise, is a special treat
May the joy of Christ's resurrection
Fill your heart and bless your life

May you and your family have a very blessed Easter.

Flowers and Time Change

This time change has been killing me. I'm finally getting to a point where I can blog a little. Between lack of sleep and work I haven't been able to get back here.

I have the sweetest son in the whole world. He came on Monday and brought me the most beautiful flowers. They smell heavenly. The whole office smells. That and a lovely note was a wonderful surprise. We even had time to sit and chat a bit before I started feeling guilty about work. This is the first time he has visited me at work. It was great.

Then I got to get my sweet grandbaby after work and take her home with me. She fell asleep on the way home. Bosco was so surprised when he came in and found her there. He gave her a good once over though. Her parents came in a little later but they got to visit a little bit after she woke up. It was a nice visit. I sat her on the counter where her mother used to sit and gave her crackers. She is getting so big. She could walk if she wanted to but she's happy crawling right now.

Tuesday was a terrible day at work. Everything went wrong and I was so tired. The time change really caught up with me. I felt like I couldn't get anyone to call me back or answer my emails. Maybe they were all feeling as yucky as I was. Luckily I made it through the day without doing too much damage and went home to go to bed early. A good night's sleep has done wonders for me.

Today is a much better day. I love days that I feel like I'm accomplishing something. Right or wrong I'm getting things done. Things are hitting the fan over some decisions that I have been told to make concerning conferences but I think I'm safe. Only time will tell.

Well back to work. Tonight is a go home and relax night. Nothing exciting except knitting and petting the dog. I have to admit night's like that can be very enjoyable. I think I may be getting old or something.

Grandchildren

I so love being a grandmother. I can't tell you the pleasure and joy that little girl brings me. I highly recommend grandmotherhood to everyone.

I got to pick sweet grandbaby up from school yesterday. She was so excited to see me. It just made my heart leap for joy. She crashed on the way home. After we got home and everything unloaded I got her out of her car seat and held her while she slept. I love doing that. When she woke up she was such a hungry baby. I cannot believe what a difference there is in her eating since she had the tubes put in her ears. After that was play time. She is at such a great age. I know the next stage will be great too but I am cherishing this one.

She was interested in something on the television and stood there all by herself for ages without even realizing it. Once she gets her confidence up there is going to be no stopping her.

Sunday she gets to come to my house while her mommy and daddy go to the ballet. I am so excited. I need to stock up on grandbaby foods to keep at my house. Now that she eats big people food I get to make dinners for her. This is going to be so much fun.

Of course Bosco is still not sure what to think of her. I'm not sure how he will feel now that she is moving around more. It's going to be interesting to see how the two of them get along as she gets bigger. I will definitely keep you posted.

Right now I am concentrating on the fact that it's Friday and I get to sleep in tomorrow mornig. I am so ready for that. Plus must clean for grandbaby's arrival. There's a busy weekend ahead.

Plus don't forget to change your clocks!

My Daddy

Today is my father's birthday. He would have been 83 years old.

He was raised in Beatrice, Nebraska. He had a great childhood. One that our children will never have. He was in farm country and had dogs and horses. He had a bull dog that he loved and grew up with him. He got Pal when he was five years old. Pal died the year Daddy went to college.

His father was the sheriff of Beatrice. Daddy was a popular guy. He played football, was on the swimming team and in the drama club. He loved to sing and dance. He was an acolyte and very involved in the church. He was a happy go lucky guy. My Grandma liked to tell the story about how he got in trouble for not coming fast enough when she called him. He was instructed to come immediately when she called no matter what. So the next time she called him, he rode his horse into the kitchen telling her he didn't want to take the time to get off.

He was working at the bakery in town when my mother went to collect a bill for the trucking company she worked for. Apparently it was love at first sight for him. He bet his best friend, who was working ther with him, that he would marry that girl. They dated and became engaged shortly before he left to join the Marine Corps. He was a member of the Second Marine division and fought in the Pacific. When he returned, my mother and her mother met him in Oregon and they were married.

They ended back in Lincoln with my father going to college and working part time. When I came along, he decided to go back into the service. He joined the army and shortly went to Officer's Training School. My father was one of the last mustangs. That is a person who works his way up from an enlisted man to an officer. After getting his bars, he went to flight school. He loved flying. Either helicopter or fixed wing. You could always see when things were getting to him but once he went flying, espcially his night flights, he came back a different person. He always said it was a wonderful experience. You leave your problems on the ground and up there it's only you and God.

During his career, he served in Korea and Vietnam. Those were hard times. He loved his family and hated being away from us. One of my earliest memories was getting up early in the morning with just him and having our morning "coffee". Mine was a drop of coffee in my milk. At that time we would sit and discuss all the affairs of the world. We had fun. We had serious talks. We laughed. This was special our time. The last time I had this with my father was the day I got married.

My father was a gifted leader. His men admired him and would follow him anywhere. Many a time one of his men would come up to me and tell me what a wonderful man he was. That he would follow my father to "hell and back" if he asked him to. I know that my father never asked his men to do something he himself would not do. I know of a couple of missions that he did in Vietnam that he wouldn't ask his men to do because of the risk.

The military was not the only thing that was my father. In fact, it was only a part of him. He was a very personable person. People were drawn to him. Especially children. He would listen to each one and they knew that he cared about what they had to say. He had a patience and a childlike quality that broke down that adult/child barrier. My counsins were so jealous of my father. They loved him so much and wanted him to be their father. In fact my cousin called my father when he was accepted into West Point before he called his own father. His heart was big and there was room for everyone. My children were fortunate to have been able to spend time with him.

He was a loving husband to my mother. They were together for 47 years. They had a wonderful life together and my father cared for her up until the day she died in his arms. He was lost without her. She was his love and his anchor.

On March 26, 1998, my father collapsed in the doctor's office. He was rushed to the hospital but he held on until my daughter and I arrived. It was hard seeing him lying there hooked up to all those machines. I took his hand and told him it was okay to go to be with my mother. He squeezed my hand. He waited until we had left the room and then he died and went to be with my mother.

There was a memorial service held for him at the Army Retirement Center that he lived. He broke the record of the number of people attending. He had made many friends and touched many lives in his life. He was a man that believed in God, country and family. He loved a party and enjoyed life to the fullest. He thought that if you slept past 6:00 am you had slept half your life away. He loved to laugh and to sing. He was always singing to us. He loved to play golf and he loved football. He was a great influence on me and his grandchildren. We all better for having had him in our lives.

Happy Birthday Daddy! We miss you.