This is my sweet grandbaby on Christmas Eve. Isn't she precious. She is getting so big.

We had a wonderful Christmas. The Tolleson/Patterson clan out did themselves again. I'm not talking about presents. Though I got some wonderful ones. I'm talking about the enjoyment of each other. Lots of good cheer and definitely too much food.

We spent Christmas eve at Missy's house. We always have a project and this year it was decorating marshmellow snowmen. We definitely had some strange snowmen when it was all over.

I was fortunate enough to be able to spend the night at Missy's house so I could be there on Christmas morning. I heard Missy and Terry talking in the bedroom so I went in to wish everyone a Merry Christmas. Serif was sleeping between them. When she heard my voice she opened her eyes and crawled over her daddy to get to me. She had no idea I would be there. That special Christmas hug was all it took to make my Christmas special.

Then it was time for me to hurry home and start cooking everyone's favorites for Christmas dinner. I love that part. The house smells so nice and inviting. Plus you can't beat having your children and grandchild home for Christmas day. It went so well that I had them all back the next night for leftovers. Personally, I think Christmas dinner always tastes better the next day.

The one thing I got for Christmas that I didn't want was bronchitis. My coughing got really bad by Christmas night. Apparently, Missy has never forgiven me for going into the hospital right after Christmas in 1999. She called the doctor the first thing the next morning and got me an appointment. Now I am on antibiotics and should be fine before the New Year. Missy ended up at the doctor's office the next day with a sinus infection. We are quite a pair aren't we?

Now for a pet peeve. I was laying in bed last night around 9:00. I am dozing on and off watching television when the phone rings. Without even thinking I grab it. In my sleepy haze I have a man on the phone asking for Patrick. I said you want Patrick and he said yes can he come to the phone. Now if I had been awake I probably would have had a come back for that. But I was half asleep and could only say that he was dead. The guy then proceeded to give the pitch to me. I said no and hung up on him. You would think these people would up date their calling lists occassionally. It's been over 9 years since Patrick died. I shouldn't still be getting phone calls for him.

Okay enough complaining. I am going home this evening and crawl into my bed and get over this stupid bronchitis. I'm tired to being sick. 2007 is going to be the year of Gloria. I'm going to try to start eating better and force myself to do some exercise. I'm getting too old to keep putting this off. I imagine you will be hearing more about this with the New Year. Right now I'm concentrating on getting well.

The holiday season is very much in swing right now. I have the house almost clean for Christmas day and will leave in a few hours to spend Christmas Eve with my daughter and her family.

Last night was so great. My son and his wonderful wife had all of us over for a Christmas Eve Eve celebration. Everything was so lovely. The house was so nice and inviting. You could see all the hard work they had been doing on the house and everything looked great. Patti did a great job on the food. As usual, I ate too much. I had such a wonderful time. The weather was terrible but it was so nice and comfortable in their house.

Their boxer, Hulda, was so funny. She thought it was great fun to have Serif at her house. It was like Serif was her own special girl. Lots of kisses and Serif quickly learned to say "no" to Hulda. Unfortunately, it was a very cute "no" that no one could take seriously.

At times like that, I am bad about sitting back and watching my children. I am so proud of them and the adults they have become. I love watching them interact with each other. Okay I admit it, I have a tendency to pat myself on the back. Raising children is not easy and I know that I made a lot of mistakes but they turned out great in spite of me.

Now it is Christmas Eve. The car is packed with presents to take over to Missy's. All of Terry's family will be gathering for our annual Christmas Eve together. I am very much into traditions. I think traditions are something that we can pass down to our children. A little piece of ourselves that they can keep going and pass on to their children. As I get older, I want to do things that will help my children and grandchildren to remember me.

Tomorrow all my children will come home and spend the day with me. I will cook the traditional Christmas dinner and we will sit around, exchange gifts and laugh a lot. That is what Christmas is to me. My family. Together.

I wish everyone a very blessed Christmas.

I can't believe how quickly the time is passing. I thought I had everything under control and now there doesn't seem to be time for anything.

I had so much fun with my sweet grandbaby on Saturday night. She woke up happy and smiling on Sunday and ate a big breakfast. Not only a whole waffle but then mommy and daddy showed up with donuts and she had bites of them too. What a big girl she is these days.

So now I'm resorted to lists. Trying to figure out when I will get everything done. I worry every year and it all comes together. Maybe not as flawlessly as I had hoped but it always comes together and everyone seems happy.

The Christmas dinner has been bought and is waiting for me to cook it on Monday. The presents are waiting for me to wrap them and the house is waiting for me to clean it. I'll get there. I'm taking Friday off so hopefully it will all come together.

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Christmas is such a time of emotions. They can go from feelings of joy and peace to missing those that are not around. Whether they have moved away or have died, your thoughts have a tendency to go to them. Then there are pleasant memories of Christmas past. Your feelings can be a roller coaster. That's the way I'm feeling right now.

This Christmas has been very exciting because of my wonderful granddaughter. This year she is noticing things and trying to figure out what is going on. It was fun introducing her to snowmen. Especially since she has no idea what snow is. Here in Austin it's supposed to get close to 80 degrees today. I did get her a snowman cup and she loves drinking out of it.

We are very fortunate this year. I think that's why the phone call I got last night was so sad. I got a call from one of the Daughters of the King. It turns out that a little 5 year old boy from our church lost his struggle for life yesterday. I was asked to help set up for the reception following the funeral. I consider it an honor to help these parents in any way I can. So I will go to the church in the afternoon. I will help the loving and caring women who will be there to make sure that everything is in place and that there is plenty of food for all who come. That's the least we can do.

Then I will go home and hug my sweet, cuddly granddaughter and thank God that we have her. She gets to spend the night with me so we will have lots of time to hug and kiss and play. I love to lay there and watch her sleep while I hold her close. Mommy and Daddy will be able to enjoy the Nutcracker and then have some special time together.

Sunday we will finish up some last minute shopping and get all the stuff we will need for our Christmas dinner.

First of all we have the Trail of Lights with the whole family. There will be a nice group of us this year since Don's family is coming too. The more the merrier. I hope Serif likes it.

So a busy weekend is planned. Hopefully I will get everything done. If not, there's always next week. Only 9 more days to go.

I almost forgot Happy Hanukkah!

Things are definitely going to have to change. Work is interferring with my blogging. I'll have to see what I can do about that.

Grammy G's house is officially ready for Christmas. Everyone came over on Sat. night and decorated the family tree. Serif was even able to help. It was so nice having everyone at the house. We ordered pizza and drank eggnog. There was a lot of laughing, teasing and remembering. I couldn't have asked for a better evening. I love when the kids are back home. Bosco even got pizza bones.

Then on Sunday we all went to Missy's for a baking party. I didn't do much baking but I did enjoy visiting with everyone. Missy's SIL is house hunting so there was lots of house talk. She made her Christmas clouds. Patti made some yummy crescent cookies. All I did was eat. That's not unusual. Kathy helped Missy and me make the bourbon balls. That's our family tradition. Hopefully Missy won't eat too many of them before they are ready on Christmas eve.

Things are getting busy. Between work and the holidays, Grammy G is a bit weary. I do have my presents bought. Just some odds and ends to pick up. But I still have to wrap everything. That plus I definitely must do some house cleaning. So much to do and so little time.

The Christmas season is definitely here. I went over to my wonderful daughter's house and watched "A Charlie Brown Christmas". It was fun to see my sweet grandbaby enjoy all the new sights and sounds of Christmas. They had put lights on their house and the baby loved going outside and seeing them.

That made me ponder all the Christmas traditions that become so ingrained in a family. Many of the family traditions are slowly being passed on to my children. It seems that Tom has taken over having the family over the night before Christmas eve. That is always fun. Then we go to Missy's on Christmas eve and my house on Christmas day. Needless to say over eating is guaranteed at that time.

Last weekend I made the banana nut bread. That is a tradition that was passed down from my parents. We always ate banana nut bread on Christmas morning. I make it for both my children so they can keep the tradition going in their own homes.

The Christmas cookies that I used to make for my children is now being done by Missy at her house. As are the bourbon balls.

Both of my children and their families come over and help decorate the family Christmas tree and we all enjoy looking at the ornaments that have been on that tree for many many years. The night is full of memories and laughter. Exactly what I love.

This year Missy and Terry are working on their own family traditions to pass down to Serif. That is one of the special things about this time of the year. You have the old traditions, like your favorite television programs and Christmas carols, that you carry from your childhood. Then there are the new traditions that you make with your new family to pass on.

I just love this time of year.

What a wonderful Thanksgiving. I couldn't have asked for a better long weekend.

Thanksgiving started early for me. I thought I was going to have to help Terry with the turkey. They were thinking of going to the Turkey Trot race on Thanksgiving morning and he would need someone to make sure the temperature stayed the same. They decided at the last minute to let Serif sleep in and they didn't need me. Since I was up, I enjoyed a quiet morning drinking my coffee and making the dressing for Thanksgiving dinner. I went over around 10 and was pleasantly surprised with cofee and coffee cake. What a way to start the day.

After visiting for a little while, Missy and Serif went off to take a shower. A clean, sweet smelling and naked baby was passed to me. I dried her off and put on her diaper. Then she fell asleep in my arms. I love when she does that. So I got to hold sweet grandbaby while her mommy and daddy scurried around getting everything ready for everyone's arrival.

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Dinner was a huge success. The turkey was falling off the bone. The ham was delicious and everyone brought food. I couldn't believe how much food there was. Missy and I sat at the kids table. That's always the best place to eat.

As good as Thanksgiving was, the leftovers on Friday were even better. Kathy, Tom, Patti and myself all arrived on Friday night to enjoy what was left of that great meal. Missy and Terry got out their Christmas tree and Serif got to begin finding out about Christmas.


As you can see Serif was quite impresed with the lights.

Then on Saturday came baking day. I had lots of banana nut bread to make for gifts this year so Missy, Terry and Serif came over to help. When Missy was little I would always put the chair up to the counter and let her play in the flour.


It may be a big mess to clean up but the fun makes it totally worth it. She enjoyed helping her Grammy G cook and was very proud of the end results. Poor Bosco had flour on him too. We had so much fun. It was perfect.

Sunday was our regular shopping. What a busy Thanksgiving weekend. I definitely could have used a few more days off. Now it's time to get everything ready for Christmas. I love this time of year.

My goodness but Grammy G has been a busy girl since I last blogged.

Thursday I finally got my job review. Not bad. I really can't complain. It looks like there will be some new jobs for me to take on next year. That's good because I honestly am not that busy at work. The work load goes up and down but mostly down. I do like being busy because it makes the day go by faster. Of course, it does cut into my blogging.

I took Friday off and Missy and I went Christmas shopping. This started right after Patrick died. November 17 is his birthday and in our grief we used that day to be together and shop. We discovered that shopping is great for dealing with grief. Anyway, after all these years it has become a tradition for us to do our Christmas shopping on this day. I am so thrilled because I got all of my precious grandbaby's presents bought and most everyone elses. A few things still to pick up in shops and some on line stuff to buy and then I will be completely done with my Christmas shopping. That means I can sit back and enjoy the season.

I also got to go with Missy to Serif's day care for their Thanksgiving dinner. That didn't work out too well because she got so excited about me being there with her mommy that she wouldn't eat. All she wanted to do was run around and show me everything. We finally had to leave so she would eat some lunch. Poor baby. Plus she is cutting molars and she's just miserable. I sure wish they would come through before Thanksgiving. It would be so much better for her and definitley easier on her mommy.

Then Friday night after all our shopping, my son and daughter-in-law came over to Missy's and we all sat around and watched The Producers. Serif just loved that show. That little girl does love a good musical.

Sunday was the usual running around. The kids surprised me with lunch and then we headed out to get our groceries for the week. It really does make a difference when we go together. It may take a little longer but it's definitely more fun. I think we got just about everything for Thanksgiving. It's going to be so much fun this year. Terry's sister got engaged and so it's not just our family but her fiancee's parents and brother. We have such a small family that's it's always wonderful when we are able to add more to the mix. It should be a great day full of family, food and friends. What more could you ask for.

The good news is that I think Missy had a good 30th birthday.

Saturday night I had the baby. We had so much fun. She is getting so big. We laughed and danced and sang. She was sound asleep when mommy and daddy finally arrived. Missy had really been enjoying her evening and was feeling no pain. She is so funny when she's had too much to drink.

Then Sunday was the family celebation. Terry's mom, Kathy, made some great sandwiches and I furnished the cake. Everyone ate too much and we all enjoyed spending time together. We are so fortunate that our families get along so well.

Serif definitely enjoyed being the center of attention and entertained everyone. I can tell you that she likes Italian creme cake. She crawled up on my lap and ate half my cake.

The bad news is that my boss in PA lost her voice cheering at a football game so my review has been postponed until Thursday morning.

That's all the news for now.

Happy Birthday Missy

This is my beautiful baby girl. She turns 30 years old on November 12.

Thirty years ago on November 12, 1976, it was a dark cold and rainy day in Austin, Texas. I was bundled up staying warm in my house except for the time I went to see the new baby up the street. How was I to know that you were the jealous type and I would go into labor while holding a 3 day old infant? At least you waited until after 5 on a Friday. I know daddy's boss appreciated that.

Your grandparents had just built a fire and sworn that nothing could get them out on a night as nasty as that night was when your father called them. They banked the fire, put on their coats and headed to the hospital. See everyone jumped for you even then.

You brought a lot of joy and laughter into our lives. There are so many memories that I have of your growing up. Like the time you toddled up to your daddy and asked him to buy you a puppy and Duke became a member of the family the next weekend. The way you liked to be the center of attention and was always performing for everyone in the room.

I remember how excited you would get when school was getting ready to start. You loved to get your new school supplies and you still do. I always thought the new school supplies is what kept you in school through your masters degree.

You were daddy's little girl and he was so proud of you. I still remember the wink he gave you when we walked into his hospital room the day he died. He always had that special smile for you.

I appreciate the woman you have become. You are a wonderful wife and mother. But most of all I'm proud of the person you have become. You are so full of love and compassion. You have a tenderness that all can see yet a strength that will get you through anything life throws at you. You are a true and loyal friend and a wonderful sister and sister-in-law. Plus no mother could ask for a better daughter.

When you were born I was so happy and so full of dreams for you. You have turned out better than I could have ever imagined. I am so proud to be your mother. You are my daughter but you are also my friend. Thank you for letting me share all the wonder of you.

There are definite advantages and disadvantages to having the same family doctor as your daughter.

I got a call last week from Missy informing me that she had just made appointments for both of us to get our flu shots. So this morning we met at the doctor's office and each got our shots. Thanks Missy for taking such good care of your old mother.

Today I get to pick up my sweet grandbaby from day care. I worry about what she is thinking when I pick her up. She always comes to me. In fact, she usually asks me to carry her out. But she has such a solemn look on her face. Like she's just not sure what to make of the fact that I'm there. By the time we get in the house she's smiling and talking but it's that look when she sees me come and get her. There are so many times I wish I see what that little girl is thinking. We'll see what happens today.

Terry stopped by last night and dropped off the presents for Missy's birthday. This way she can't see them and she also can't try to get Terry to give them to her early. He's really catching on to her ways. This may be the first birthday that she has had to wait until her actual birthday to open her presents. I will take them over with me when I go for her party on Sunday. Good thinking Terry.

Here are my two loves. This weekend the kids came over so that Serif could play soccer in my back yard. I don't think she's quite ready to go pro but she did kick the ball a couple of times. We all enjoyed standing around and watching her.

Bosco is my 13 year old brown lab. You can see the gray on his muzzle. He loves that little girl so much and is so jealous of her. It is very much a love/hate relationship. He is jealous of the time I spend with her but he sure does like to eat the things that she eats and she loves to share. He will just lay there and let her do anything she wants to him. She loves to kiss and hug him. Unfortunately, that usually happens when he is sound asleep. He is such a good dog.

This rock used to be Missy's special spot to sit. She would sit on it and think deep thoughts or just look around the yard. It's funny to see it go to the next generation. That's one of the nice parts of living in a house for so long. There are definitely lots of memories.

My pictures got reversed but the top shows what happened to Minnie after a hard day of Trick or Treating. The bottom picture shows my beautiful grandbaby all dressed up and ready to go.

Halloween

I have to tell you that I had a fantastic Halloween.

For the first time in a quite a while I had my whole family at the house. It was so wonderful. First of all I left work early and went by and voted. Then off to the house to get ready for Halloween.

Missy, Terry and Serif came by to show off their costumes. I have to tell you that Serif was the cutest Minnie Mouse ever. Missy and I took her to a couple of houses by my house and while we were gone Tom and Patti came by.

Poor Serif just did not know what to think about this Halloween stuff. Why in the world would you go to stranger's houses and take candy from them? Missy said it didn't take long for her to catch on though. After my house they went on to Terry's family so that they could go trick or treating with them. It was a busy night for little Serif.

After Terry, Missy and Serif left, Tom, Patti and I were able to sit around and have a wonderful visit. It's been too long since we were able to just sit back and enjoy each other's company. I couldn't have asked for a more perfect evening.

There weren't many trick or treaters this year so I have lots of candy left over. Good think I bought the kind that I like isn't it?

Weekend Update

What a wonderful weekend Grammy G had. What could be better than spending the whole weekend with the most wonderful little girl in the whole world?

We had so much fun. We played and played. We talked lots. We sang and danced. We had lots of hugs and kisses. It was just perfect. She was so good. I know Missy missed her but I'm so glad I had her. Unfortunately, Tom never stopped by. It would have been nice to have spent some time with him too. It was funny because my best friend called while I was babysitting. Her granddaughter was spending the night with her too. We got to compare notes. In fact, she called every night just to see if I was still having fun. Trust me, I was.

Poor Bosco. He's 13 years old and isn't used to kids being around. Just as he was going to sleep she would come up and hug and kiss him. He would just lay there and take it. Then go back to sleep until the next time. He did enjoy getting to eat her leftovers. I think that was the highlight of the weekend for him. Lots of Serif food. Serif thought it was so funny that I sang our good morning song to the dog.

The work the kids got done on their bedroom is unbelieveable. It looks fantastic. They worked so hard and it shows. I just love the color they picked for their bedroom. I can't discribe it but it brings out the wood of the furniture. It looks so good it almost makes me want to get off my you know what and do something around my house. Notice I said almost?

The smile on that baby's face when her mommy and daddy walked in on Sunday was precious. She was so happy to see her mommy and daddy. Lots of hugs and kisses were exchanged. The kids even took me to Quiznos to thank me for taking care of her. I got to see the finished room and then it was off to Target for halloween candy.

Missy was too tired for the store so I went alone and got everything I needed for the coming week. I was also able to cook the Halloween chili so the kids can pick it up tonight. Doing all that and then cleaning up all the toys that were thrown around the living room made for one tired Grammy. Needless to say I slept really good last night.

So I'm already for the trick or treaters tomorrow night. I hope we gets lots of kids. I do enjoy seeing all the different costumes and it's great to see the neighborhood kids.

TGIF

Well the weekend is almost here. I am definitely ready for it.

The kids have made their decision. They are staying in town and painting their bedroom. Personally, I think that's a good idea for meany reasons. First it will give them a great sense of accomplishment and they have been wanting to do this for so long. Second it will be easier in case someone changes their mind about the weekend. I'm not saying anyone will, but whether it be Missy or Serif, it's nice to know that they can. After all, this is the first time they have been separated for this length of time. I know how hard it would be for me. I just hope they get everything done. Then they can sit back and enjoy their new room.

Last night Tom called to check in. It's always so good to hear from him. I'm so proud of Tom and what he has accomplished. He has been through so much and is doing so well. He's come a long way. Patti is busy this weekend so he may come and spend some time with Serif and me on Saturday. I think that would be so great. He and Patti are so good with that baby. They are crazy about her. She is a very loved little girl.

I have told Missy to have Serif at my house by 7:00 this evening. Charlie Brown is coming on and I want Serif to see if. It is going to be so much fun watching her watch the holiday television specials this year. She is getting so big and we are all enjoying her so much as she gets bigger.

She is going to be Minnie Mouse for Halloween. I can't wait to see her all dressed up. Missy has promised to take lots of pictures for me. I think I'm going to have to give in and get my own camera. It takes too long to get pictures out of Missy.

Now I have to finish my work so I can start my weekend.

Surprise

I got the nicest surprise when I arrived home after a long day at work. There was my wonderful family waiting for me. It was so nice to walk into the house with everyone there. Serif came to greet me at the door. Usually the house is so quiet when I get home. On top of that Terry brought in dinner for me. What more could I ask for.

Then they were off for their appointment and Serif and I were on our own. I fixed her some dinner which she ate like a big girl. She is not a big eater so when she eats anything we all get excited. The dog enjoyed all the leftovers. He does eat well when she's there.

Then it was time to play. She is such a good girl. We played and read stories until mommy and daddy came home. Boy does her face light up when they walk through the door.

Tonight I need to get ready for this weekend. Since I'm not sure what all I can get done with my little helper around, I need to get some of my weekend chores done before she arrives. I did make the swiffer her size so she can at least help me with the floors.

The kids don't even know what they are going to do. They can't decide between going to the coast with friends, having a romantic weekend just the two of them or painting and decorating their bedroom. So many choices. I just want them to have fun. They deserve it. Lets just hope they have made up their minds by the time they leave the baby with me tomorrow afternoon.

Grandparents

I can't believe how long it's been since I last blogged. Work is starting to interfer with my blogging. That is definitely not good.

Today I get to babysit. It's always fun to spend a few hours with my favorite little girl. What is going to be an experience is this weekend. I am going to have my precious grandbaby for the whole weekend. This is big. This will be a first time for both of us. I hope she's ready for this. I hope I'm ready for this.

My children spent lots of time with their grandparents. That was one of the advantages of living so close to them. I enjoyed the nights that they spent at their grandparents houses and I know how much it meant to their grandparents. That is such a special relationship. I know how important those memories are for my children. I want those memories for my granddaughter too.

Everything is ready. I have the milk, the chicken nuggets and the goldfish. I have the toys ready to be played with. I have warned the dog that she is coming. All we need is the baby.

As I have said before, I didn't see my grandparents very often. When I have about four years old my father was sent to Korea. My mother and I moved to California to be closer to my father's parents. I have some memories of that time.

One memory is being at my grandparents house while my two cousins were there. Jimmy and Jeff. My parents did not get along very well with my Aunt Madeline. In fact, in later years, my father would disown her. I remember that my grandmother was rocking the other children one by one and putting them down for a nap. She asked me to let her rock me for a little while. That she knew that I didn't need a nap but that it would help with the little ones. I remember her holding me as she rocked. I didn't go to sleep but she talked to me as she rocked me back and forth. Thinking back, I think that was more for her than the little ones. That's one of the few times she was able to hold and rock me. That's so sad. Especially when I think of the hours I have spent rocking and hold my granddaughter. I treasure every minute of that time. I never realized how much my grandmother missed out on with our being so far away. The first time I spent the night with my grandparents was when I was 14 just before we left to spend three years in Germany.

My closeness was not with my grandparents but with my grandmother's father. My Great-Grandpa Brown. Most of my memories are of him. I would love to sit on the porch swing and talk to him. We would just swing and talk. I don't remember what we talked about. I know he talked a lot about the old days. The thing I remember is that he always made me feel like what I said was important. I also remember that he loved to play solitaire and it would bother me that he cheated when he didn't think I was looking. I remember coming home from trick or treating on Halloween when I was seven and my parents getting the telephone call that he had died in his sleep. I'm so thankful for the time I got to spend with him.

Houses

This weekend Missy had me watch a movie called "My Life As A House". This was wonderful and touching movie and about a man, his son and the house they are building. I definitely recommend it but I do suggest that you have a box of kleenex with you when you watch it.

This got me to thinking about the houses we live in. Some of us live in big houses and some in small houses. I live in a small house. When we moved into our house 29 years ago it was new. It was our job to create the home that this house was to be. To give the memories that would be stored in the soul of the house.

All of these houses start out the same. It is what we fill them with that makes them a home or just a dwelling for our possessions. I'm not talking about furniture. I'm talking about the feeling that get when you enter a home. Our home was one of those houses that was not quiet. We had two children and numerous animals running around. Our furniture was hand me down. But when I entered that home I always felt love surround me. I hope that is what everyone else felt when they entered that door.

Now the children are gone and the house has a quiet that is totally different from before. It is weathered and worn. Like it's owner. In the last few years, the home has changed. Now it has become a refuge and sanctuary. It is where I go when something is amiss. Either with my mind, spirit or body. It is my safe haven that I can run to, lock the door and feel safe. It is where I can hide from the rest of the world. The house and I have grown old together.

But even though the house is my sanctuary and retreat, it is still a home. A place where my children can come. A place where they can return to their childhoods. It is their place of comfort when needed. And on special occassions, like Christmas, it is the return to memories and traditions that are so important to a family.

Now the house is making new memories with a new generation. Once again the living room is cluttered with the toys of a child. Squeals of laughter fill the air when my granddaughter is there. Hopefully, when she is older, this house will hold lots of memories of love and laughter. I hope that she will always feel safe and secure when she walks through that front door.

Yes, a house can so much more than the bricks and wood that make it a house.

Fall

Fall has finally arrived in Central Texas. I'm sure it won't last but it was so wonderful to walk out to 50 degree temperatures this morning. In a couple of days we will be back in the 90's again so I plan to enjoy it while I can. We seem to have two seasons around here. Air conditioning and heating.

At least Serif found she could still wear her sweater


I hope everyone has a great weekend.

Sick Baby

I love computers. Not only is it a great way to keep in touch with the world but it's a great way to keep in touch with your family.

What did we do before we could im someone whenever we wanted to? This morning I had a sick grandbaby. There's nothing worse than a sick baby. She was throwing up during the night. Her poor little tummy was bothering her and she didn't want to eat anything. Her mommy stayed home with her.

Missy was good enough to im me and let me know what was going on. She has been able to keep me informed step by step of Serif's progress throughout the day. From when she was able to start sipping water to when she woke up and finally smiled. I am so fortunate to have a daughter who includes me in this wonderful little girl's life.

These days families are scattered and it's hard for grandparents to spend time with their grandchildren. I know of grandmother's who, if they are lucky, get to see their grandchildren once a year. When I was growing up I didn't see my grandparents that often. To me they were voices over a telephone.

I was so happy that my children grew up in the same town as their grandparents. They were able to enjoy them as they grew up. Both of my children have loving memories of their grandparents. There is a special bond between a grandparent and their grandchildren.

I am so happy that I live in the same town as my precious Serif. I try to spend as much time as I can with her. I want to be as much a part of her life as I can. I feel sorry for those grandparents that live close to their grandchildren and don't take advantage of spending time with their grandchildren. They are missing so much.

I definitely think they have it right when they said the best part of having children is that sooner or later, if you're lucky, you get to become a grandparent.

Serif is feeling better so Grammy G will be stopping by for some hugs and kisses on the way home from work. I am so lucky.

Home

Grammy G was what is known as an Army brat. That means that my daddy (your great-grandpa) was in the army and we moved around a lot. When I was growing up we usually moved every two to three years. It could be hard. Especially being an only child. That meant I spent a lot of time alone and learned to play by myself at an early age.

Don't get me wrong. I loved my life. Of course, to be honest, it was the only life I knew. What I was getting at is that I was used to change.

When I met your grandpa, I settled down to one spot. When we first got married, we lived in a duplex on 6th street. Grandpa's Granny lived in the other side of the duplex. It was nice there and we loved it but we both worked in North Austin. This meant we had to get up very early in the morning to get to our jobs. Since my job started at 7:00 am, we had to be on the road by 6. Trust me, nothing has changed. Grammy G was even less of a morning person back then. So we started looking for a house in North Austin.

We found a great little house. I loved that house. It looked like a doll house. It was very small but perfect for our little family. We were so happy there. That's where we brought your mother after she was born. Unfortunately, adding another child to the family (we already had your Uncle Tom) made the house a little small for us. So we had to look for a house big enough for the 4 of us.

That's when we found the house that Grammy G lives in now. Your mommy was 9 months old when we bought that house. Grammy G has been in that house 29 years this last July. As I said before, I was an Army brat and I was not used to staying in one place that long.

Your grandpa was used to coming home and finding the furniture moved around. That's what I would do when I needed a change. I would move furniture. That worked pretty good but right now I've run out of ways to rearrange my furniture.

Maybe that's why lately Grammy G has actually thought about moving. This last summer was really hard on me. The temperature was over 100 degrees most of the summer. The allergies have been the worse they've ever been. So I started thinking about the possibility of moving.

Then I thought about where I would go. I have family in Kansas. I have lived in Kansas and, even though it is a very nice state, I wouldn't want to live there. I have friends in Colorado and in Oregon. The weather would be nicer there. (At least until the snow came) But then I realized why I couldn't go to any of those places. It's because you wouldn't be there. I don't want to leave my wonderful beautiful grandbaby or my wonderful family. You are too precious and you are growing up so fast. There is no way that I would willingly miss a minute of my special time with you.

So thoughts of moving have put away until they sneak into my thoughts again. I will continue to try to figure out how to rearrange the living room and I will spend every minute I can with you. Afterall, home is where the heart is and my heart is all yours.

Family

This has been a very busy weekend for Grammy G. It was all about family. Just the way I like it. I got to spend lots of time with all my favorite people.

Friday night I had a wonderful visit with Tom, Missy and Serif. As usual, Serif was the main attraction. She entertained us all. Terry had to deal with some family matters and joined us later in the evening. It was all very relaxed and a perfect ending to the work week.

Saturday brought the preparation for Emily's 10th birthday party. What a special day for a luau. The weather was warm and the sky was bright blue. Missy and Terry were helping to care for their friend's animals while they were away this weekend. That meant I got to go with them to care for them on the way to the party and then again when the party was over. It was so much fun to visit with Tibalt and Hamlet. They are both great. Hamlet is the cat and usually a little leery of people but since mommy and daddy were gone Ham was more than happy to accept pets from me. Tibalt, part wiener dog and rat terrier, loves everyone. We had a good visit. Tibalt and Serif are great friends.

Then it was off to the party. We got there early to help set up. Terry's mother is one of those talented people that is very creative. She made a tiki hut bar and also one of those cardboard posters that you put your head through to have your picture taken. One side was a hula girl and the other was a male torch dancer. All the girls loved having their pictures taken. There were straws with flowers on them. Rubber duckies were provided for your drinks. Or, in Serif's case, chewed on. There was a limbo contest and a hula hoop contest. Lots of laughter all around. It was a great birthday party and I think everyone had a wonderful time. The only draw back to the whole day was mosquitos. By the end we were all just scratching our legs raw.

By the time the party was over, all the grownups were pooped. We grabbed Terry's mother and the five of us headed out to a well deserved dinner. It was so nice to sit and relax over some good mexican food. Serif made the rounds around the table and enjoyed eating from everyone's plate. She gave special attention to both of her grandmothers. After a nice relaxing dinner and good conversation, we were all ready to go home to our beds.

Sunday morning was for laying around and relaxing. I had felt like I had spent very little time with Bosco so he got my full attention. Lots of pets and loves. After everyone had a nice relaxing morning and naps were out of the way, it was off to the store. Poor Terry was sick on Sunday so he wasn't having the best time. Allergies in Austin are bad this time of year.

After the store, it was home to get ready for a new week. It was such a nice weekend. I always love spending time with family. But I have to admit it was nice to kick off my shoes, pick up some knitting and relax in front of the TV. Sometimes there just aren't enough hours in the weekend.

Sore Feet

I read somewhere that as you get older you lose padding on the bottom of your feet. Can you believe that? Now, trust me, Grammy G has lots of fat she could lose all over her body. But I never wanted to lose fat from the bottom of my feet. Guess that explains why I need to buy cushions for my shoes. Another of those strange things about getting old.

They really wear that sweet grandbaby out at day care. I was lucky enough to be able to pick her up from day care yesterday. I got that sweet smile of hers when I got there but she was falling asleep by the time I was buckling her into the car seat. Such a sweet baby. Bosco went crazy when I carried her into the house. He just couldn't understand why he couldn't kiss her when we got there. Finally after about an hour I let him nudge her some and I started loving on her. We were able to ease her awake and she woke up with a smile on her face. Then the fun began. We got to play. She loves her new baby doll. Luckily I remembered to pick it up because Bosco loves it too. Unfortunately, his love is a little more distructive than hers.

The only time she was unhappy was when I wouldn't give her one of Bosco's goodies. I finally had to give Bosco one of her animal crackers and then give her one. She gave her first one to Bosco to make sure they were eating the same thing and then took one for herself. Boy that dog eats well when she's around.

Friends

Grammy G is so lucky. I have wonderful children but my children have wonderful friends.

Last night as I was standing at the refrigerator trying to figure out what to cook, my wonderful daughter called. She told me that my precious granddaughter missed her Grammy and that their friends had included me in their invitation to go to dinner. How sweet is that? I couldn't say no. Especially when my bug missed her Grammy. I petted old Bosco and was out the door. When I pulled up all the kids were in the front yard. Serif got the biggest grin on her face when she saw her Grammy drive up. That definitely made my day.

We had such a nice visit. Missy's friend Marissa is getting ready to leave for Las Vegas to attend her brother's wedding. How exciting. Two young people getting ready to start their lives together. I know it's going to be a joyous occasion for everyone. I even gave Marissa some quarters from me to play in the slot machine. Hey, I'll try anything.

This afternoon I get to pick Serif up from day care. How exciting. I can't wait for this work day to be over. I will take her home with me and her parents can get her after their appointment. I have a list of everything that I'm supposed to remember from the school. Hope I remember everything. Once I get my hands on that baby, everything else just goes out the window.

Monday

It's already Monday. I can't believe that the weekend is already over. There just aren't enough hours in the weekend for me.

Last night a cold front came into Austin. Now here in Austin cold fronts are different than in other areas. It meant that the temperature went down to the 50's during the night and the high is supposed to be around 85. After over 100 degree temperatures all summer that's down right cold.

I love the cooler nights. It feels so good to snuggle into the bed and be all comfy and warm. Of course right when you get to the good comfy the alarm goes off and it's time to get up and get ready for a new week of work. Don't get me wrong, I love my job and the people I work with. I just wish I could work like say from 10-5. At full pay of course. Then I could sleep in and get up when I feel like it.

I had such a nice weekend. It's so boring but just the way I like it. We had family night on Friday night. Patti has been having problems with her medication so she couldn't make it. We all met at Missy's house and had a nice visit. We sat around the table and ate some pizza and then played a game. It was a short night because everyone was tired after a busy week at work. Plus it had been a more emotional week that usual.

Saturday I had a Daughter of the King meeting in the morning. In the evening the kids came by and surprised me with dinner. We sat and watched Gray's Anatomy. The kids couldn't watch it so I recorded it so we could all watch it together. I love my DVR. The plan was for me to take care of bug for a couple of hours but she would have nothing to do with that. She was determined that she was going home with mommy and daddy. As they drove away, she had that grin on her face. The one that said yup I got my way. She is so much like her mother at that age.

After the kids left, my best friend called to chat. We love to sit and compare stories about our grandchildren. Of course she has more stories to tell since she as three grandchildren and I only have the one. Since I had my precious Serif spend the night with me, she decided it was time for her Layla to spend the night with her granny. Apparently they had a fantastic time too. That is so special. I can't wait until mine will spend the night with me again.

Sunday is our usual shopping day. The grocery store is lots more fun when we go as a family. Makes it go by faster. First we went to Target to get Emily her birthday presents. I think I got some things she will like. I sure hope so. I still can't believe she's going to be 10 years old. Then it was off to the grocery store.

Toddlers are so funny. Last weekend Serif couldn't get enough of me. This weekend she wanted nothing to do with me. Oh I got a quick kiss and she let me hold her for a little while but she really wanted her mommy and daddy this weekend. That's okay. I'll be patient. Maybe next weekend she'll want to be with me again.

Wonderful Children

I honestly don't know how I could have gotten through yesterday without my wonderful children and my precious grandbaby. They are my link to my wonderful Patrick.

For some reason this has been a hard year for both my kids. As I have said before, perhaps we feel the loss more because of our precious little girl. I am so sorry he can't enjoy her the way I can.

I was able to spend the day with Missy and Serif. We had lunch with Tom and Terry and then we girls headed to the mall. I was surprised that I was able to find some shoes for me. That definitely brightened a dreary day.

After work we all got together and went to the lake. The drought was really obvious. The lake was down so low. But it was beautiful out there. I am always happy when we can go there. It's so much nicer than a graveyard. Serif got to see the fish swimming in the lake. It was lovely and peaceful and I think it helped everyone.

When we left the lake, we all went out to eat. It was nice sitting around a nice big round table with my family around me. I was so thankful that I was able to be with them. Of course Serif kept us all entertained.

The depression is lifting. It felt good to go to work today. I pray that Missy's depression will leave her soon too. I know that this is hard on her. I wish I could help her but all I can do is be there if she needs me.

Patrick will always be missed. But he is part of us and he is always in our thoughts and in our hearts. Life still goes on and I plan to do a lot of living before I join him. Afterall, there's a grandbaby to spoil.

How Long?

So how long do your mourn your one true love? Is it a year, two years, an eternity?

Tomorrow my wonderful husband will be dead 9 years. That is a long time to mourn. I get mad at myself for missing him so much. I figured okay 1, 2, maybe even 3 years this day would be hard but who thought it would still hurt so much 9 years later.

True, I don't pine for him daily. I do think of him almost daily. Happy thoughts of our times together. Even an occassional thought of not so happy times together. I do talk to him almost every day. But I don't think I'm hanging on to him in an unhealthy manner.

We had almost 25 wonderful years together. Like any couple we had our good times and our bad times. I have to admit that the good times definitely out numbered the bad. Patrick was a very loving and giving man. He loved his family more than life itself. There was nothing he wouldn't do for any of us. He left behind a legacy of love that we will all cherish.

Don't get me wrong he had his faults. He was human and he was a man. Needless to say there were days I could have throttled him. But in the end we had a wonderful friendship. We loved to talk and laugh. I remember those talks that would start after the kids went to bed and lasted until the wee hours of the morning. I remember having a bad dream and having him there to hold me when I reached out to him.

Maybe it's seeing his grandchild growing into such a little person and seeing bits of him in her. Maybe it's knowing how much he looked forward to being a grandfather and the fact that he is missing this beautiful child. Maybe it's remembering all the plans and hopes and dreams that we had for our golden years that will never be.

Tomorrow I will spend time with our children and grandchild. They are a piece of him and our love that will live on. Yes he is gone physically but he is so in my heart that he is never far from me.

On this the anniversary of his death, I will remember his wonderful smile, his gentle caress, his wonderful kiss and gives thanks for the years we had and try not to think of the years we aren't going to have.

Slumber Party

I can't believe it has been so long since I last blogged. I definitley need to do something about that. I have been very lazy lately.

This weekend was a special treat for Grammy G. My sweet grandbaby spent the night with me. This was the first time she has slept away from her mommy and daddy. I was so excited to be the one.

I was all prepared. I went to the store and got one of those rails for my bed and installed it on Saturday morning. On Friday night I went to the store and got milk and some goodies for us. She is a picky eater so I got things I new she liked. I always have animal cookies for her but I needed some ice cream and gold fish. She does like her gold fish.

As usual, she didn't want mommy and daddy to leave but once they left there were no problems. We went outside and played a little and read books and hugged and kissed and she played with her toys. We sang and talked. She was such a sweet happy little girl. Then around 10:30 she just walked over to me and put up her arms. I picked her up and she laid her head on my shoulder. She patted my back a couple of times and went right to sleep. I put her in my bed and I crawled in with her.

Poor Bosco, my sweet old lab, was not sure what to make of this. Her parents were supposed to come and get her. I am his mommy and he doesn't like to share. He loves her but he's a bit jealous. Actually he's a lot jealous. He must have come over to check on me three different times during the night. I guess he wanted to make sure I still loved him most.

She slept so good. I was constantly waking up and checking her. That's normal since it was the first time and I'm not used to having someone in my bed. She stirred a little around 6:20 but didn't wake up until 8:30 in the morning. I was so lucky. She wasn't sure what to make of everything when she woke up in my bed and saw me. There was a surprised look on her face and then after I sang her a good morning song she smiled at me.

In the living room I put on some oldies music and she and I danced and sang as we got ready to greet the day. That baby does like good music. She was so happy. I got her some milk and she helped me get Bosco fresh water. These days Bosco is jealous when she gets something to eat and she gets jealous if Bosco gets one of his goodies. Each wants what the other is having. Just like a couple of little kids.

I had gotten some muffins for her breakfast. She would go over to the dining room chair and pat on it. I would then sit down and put her on my knee and she would eat. Why talk when all you have to do is point, pat or grunt. Right?

Then it was more dancing and playing with toys. Around 10 o'clock I thought she wanted to talk to her parents so I called them. They were doing great without her and were sleeping. Apparently it wasn't them she wanted to talk to because she just went on playing when they were on the phone.

The kids arrived around 11:30 to a big smile from their baby. She was so happy to see them. After some visiting we headed out to the church. This was my day to deliver altar flowers. I am happy to say that the one delivery we were dreading (the 14 months old little boy in Children's Hospital) had been sent home and we were thrilled to send some flowers to him through his grandma. The rest of the fowers were left at a nursing home to help brighten the place for those staying there.

The kids took me to lunch in payment for baby sitting. Silly them. I thought that's what all the bug kisses were for. Apparently Grammy time wasn't over because that sweet grandbaby wanted to be on my lap and eat some my lunch which I was more than happy to share.

Then we went shopping. She was so good and I got lots of hugs and kisses throughout the day. A fact that was pointed out many times by her mother. I couldn't believe how lucky I was. We wore that poor baby out. She was asleep before we hit the grocery store and slept through the entire grocery store.

By the time I got home I was exhausted. It had been a long day and I'm not used to picking up and holding 20 pounds of love so much. My back and arms definitely felt it. The poor dog was just dragging. After a few phone calls, Bosco and I were off to relax in our beds. He was spread out snoring in his dog bed before I ever got into my bed. I have to admit I didn't watch much television before I went to sleep.

Shortly after I got into bed, the thunder and lightning started. It was wonderful. We are so dry and my poor yard needed the rain so badly. I love laying there listening to the rain on the roof. What a wonderful way to fall asleep after such a perfect weekend.

Thanks, kids, for sharing your wonderful precious daughter with me. It meant the world.

Vacation Pictures

Okay so we are home and everyone is back on schedule. The pictures are developed from the trip and life goes on as normal. There is one problem. As I sit and scan the hundreds of pictues taken, one thought keeps going on over and over in my mind.

Who the hell is the fat old lady holding my granddaughter?!!!

I guess it's true that we never see the real us when we look in the mirror because I swear I have never seen that old lady before. But that same face and body keeps showing up. What is going on here?

In case you haven't guessed, part of the problem is that I have had another birthday. Normally birthdays don't bother me but, as I am getting closer and closer to 60, they are starting to bug me more and more.

So what is the solution here. Well I could start lying about my age, but I really don't think that would help.

I could go on a diet and lose a bunch of weight. The problem with that is that my fat and my body have become so close over the years that I notice they have a strong attachment to each other. They hold on to each other closely. If I could convince them to part ways, I would like to lose about 100 pounds. That would make me a chubby grandmother. Not bad. I could live with chubby grandmother. Then the kids wouldn't have to get an extra large coffin for me either. Then when I looked at my pictures I'd be older, skinnier and saggier. Not sure about that either.

So here's my solution. While I contemplate another diet and how to make my life more miserable. I know it's not a diet it's a lifestyle change.

Anyway, back to the subject...From now on my children can hold the image of me in their hearts because there will be NO MORE PICTURES OF ME!

There that takes care of the problem for now. I can live with that.

Home Again

We are home from our wonderful vacation. Everything was great. I loved being with my family enjoying all the California sights.

I am a cancer so going to the coast in San Diego was wonderful. I loved standing there and looking out into that beautiful ocean while the tide rushed over my feet.

The zoo was fun and Serif loved the polar bears. They put on a good show for her. We wore ourselves out though.

Then it was off to Disney Land. We spent the afternoon we arrived in Downtown Disney. The next day was half of Disney Land. Then there was the California Adventure and our last day was the rest of Disney Land.

We went on lots of rides. I had a ball. Kathy, Terry's mother, took me on my very first every roller coaster. I even have a picture to prove it. It was great and I am sure that one day I will do another. I loved the Haunted Mansion. That was where Serif waved to the ghosts. So many rides and so many memories. It was awesome.

This was not one of those laid back relaxing vacations. We were on the go from the first day. We would start out in the morning and not stop until it was time for bed. My poor feet had no idea what I was doing to them.

When we got back Tom had made hot dogs and hamburgers and brought them over to celebrate the 4th. We had a wonderful family celebration that ended with fire works in the front yard. It was after midnight when I finally crawled home. I was totally exhausted.

The next day was spent in bed and resting on the sofa trying to get my poor swollen feet to get back to a fairly normal size. Boy it sure was hard to get up and go to work on Thursday. Luckily it was only a 2 day week. I'm going to enjoy this weekend.

I cannot tell you how great Serif was on this trip. That baby was so good. Here she was away from home being dragged everywhere and off her usual schedule but you wouldn't have known it. She was so good and seemed to really enjoy herself. I hope she remembers some of it. Luckily her mother took hundreds of pictures to remind her.

Tom did a great job taking care of the house for me. Bosco was in good shape but I think he missed me because he wouldn't leave my side on Wednesday. He was right there even when I went to the bathroom. Poor puppy was so unhappy when I had to go back to work. He's going to be happy when we get back into our old routines this weekend.

We are so fortunate that we have a family that can spend 6 days together without any problems. Everyone got along wonderfully. It was a vacation full of love, laughter and memories. It's a vacation I will cherish always. Thank you Missy and Terry.

Busy Bee

I can't believe that this is Monday and we leave for California on Wednesday. Time is really getting short and there is so much to do.

It was a jam packed weekend. It started on Friday night with the family getting together. I was able to give Tom all the last minute isntructions for while I am gone. I am so fortunate to have a son who is willing to house sit and take care of my puppy. Between him and the neighbors everything should be taken care of. Bosco won't even know I'm gone.

I got up on Saturday and did my cleaning. Then I got to take care of my wonderful granddaughter for a few hours so her mommy and daddy could get some cleaning done at their house without a little one under foot. She and I had so much fun. She is so active now. You spend a lot of time running after her. I love the way she stops and looks back to make sure you are there. She was fascinted with my bedroom this time. She discovered the nightstand and loved getting all the books out and looking through them. We would sit and talk while she sorted through everything. My goodness that little girl can move. After much talking and laughing it was time for a nap. She just came up to me and put her arms up to be picked up. When I lifted her up she laid her head on my shoulder and went to sleep. Can anything be more precious? We both had a nice little nap and then mommy and daddy showed up to take her home. I had such a wonderful time with her and Bosco was so good with her. He really does love her. He's just happy when she goes home.

Then Sunday was running around and getting the last of the stuff. I still have some things to pick up but most of the stuff is finished. I even got a few things put in the suitcase. I still can't believe we're going.

Guess it's time to make my final list of things to do. With my memory, a list is a must.

Shoes

Who would have thought that finding a comfortable pair of walking sandals could be so difficult. Missy and I have been trying to find shoes for our vacation. We needed something that would be comfortable and let us walk for all the hours need for the San Diego Zoo and Disney Land. That isn't that much to ask.

So on Saturday afternoon we set off on our journey. We started at our usual place...Target. We want good shoes but we don't want to necessarily pay a lot for them. After wandering around and making several purchases, we emerge shoeless. So it was onto the mall. We went to every department and shoe store in the mall. Looking and not finding. It was very discouraging. We actually found ourselves in a time warp. We both figured it was around 5:00 but when I looked at my watch it was 7:15. We could not believe it. We left the mall tired, discouraged and shoeless.

On a brighter note I must say that I have the most wonderful granddaughter in the whole world. She put up with all that time in the mall like a real trooper. She walked around a little but spent most of the time in her stroller just singing along as we shopped. She was such a good girl.

I have to admit that I was very discouraged. I was so afraid that I would not find what I was looking for to wear on the trip. I knew I could get some tennis shoes but I really wanted some sandals. It is going to be hot and I didn't want to fool with socks and such. I know I can be a bit picky.

On Monday Missy suggested we go to REI and see what they have. So we take our lunch hour on Tuesday and head out shoe shopping again. I couldn't believe that we walked in and I found exactly what I wanted. Even though I tried on other shoes, the first ones were the ones I got. I love them and have been wearing them to make sure they are comfortable for the trip. Unfortunately, Missy's aren't as comfortable and will have to take hers back. I have faith she will find what she wants when she exchanges them. Okay I spent a little more than I wanted but they are so worth the money and will definitely last forever. Plus my feet seem to really like them. So that is one more thing to take off the list.

So I guess the moral of this story is not to give up. What you are looking for is out there. You just have to keep looking. Hope that's true about bags. That's the next thing on my list.

Father's Day

Sunday is Father's Day. Missy has a great day planned in celebration of Terry's second year as a father. He really is a great father. He deserves a special day.

It used to be that I hated Father's Day. After lossing both Patrick and my father within 6 months of each other, Father's Day was just a reminder of what I didn't have. I still miss them both terribly but life goes on. They are in a better place and I'm here with a precious little girl.

So, the present is bought and everything is ready to celebrate the newest father in our family. I hope his day is as special as he is.

Happy Father's Day Terry. And Happy Father's Day to all the father's out there both young and old.

Party Time

What a full weekend I had. I am dragging this Monday morning but it was worth it.

First of all, I got to babysit my sweet grandbaby on Saturday afternoon while her parents got ready for the party. What fun we had. We went outside and looked around. We took a little nap and then we played. Then her mommy and daddy came to get her and, along with her uncle Tom, we all went out for a great dinner. Everyone was in good spirits and we had a wonderful time.

Sunday was a busy day. I had to go to the grocery store alone. That was strange. I don't usually do that. Usually it's a family affair. I did miss my girls while I was there but Missy called and we chatted. Yes, I was one of those ladies going through the grocery store with a phone to her ear.

I went over to help the kids get ready for the party. (They called. I wouldn't have gone over if they hadn't. I'm not THAT kind of a mother.) I watched the baby while they did some last minute cleaning. Then Kathy came over and we filled up the balloons while Tom and Patti did the crepe paper. It was lots of fun. Before we knew it the house was filling up. I can't believe how many people came. There were kids running every. It was perfect. Of course, there were a few tantrums here or there but overall the kids were really good. She had no idea what was going on. She just kept walking around.

Tom and Patti got her the neatest piano. It's a prefect little minature red piano. It is just darling. Lots of clothes and books. At this age, they have no idea about getting things. She was not interested at all in opening presents. She was more interested in all the big kids running around.

The party was supposed to be from 3-5. I think the last family left around 9:00. That is the sign of a successful party. Missy and Terry worked so hard on everything and it showed. Their house looked great and the decorations were perfect.

Tom, Patti, Marissa, Aaron, Missy, Terry and I sat around after everyone left just relaxing. It was wonderful sitting back and just visitng for a little while. Before we knew it, it was after 10:30. I finally got home a little after 11. Exhausted but happy. I do have to admit that it was hard to get up and get going this morning but it was well worth it.

Serif had a first birthday that will be remembered by family and in pictures for years to come. It was a perect way to celebrate her first year.

TGIF

It's Friday and I can't wait for the weekend. Not only for the sleep which I am really looking forward to but it's also the big birthday party for our new one year old. There will be lots of friends and family gathering on Sunday to enjoy my sweet granddaughter. It's going to be lots of fun.

Last night best friend called to talk about grandbabies. She has three and, just like me, never tires of chatting about them. I answer the phone and hear: "Is this the grammy of a one year old!" That started it and, except for an occassional stray to our health, the total conversation was about how fortunate we are to have these wonderful creatures in our lives. She leaves on Saturday to go to the beach with all of her grandchildren for the week. I'm so happy for her. This is a special time for them. We are so fortunate that we have children who include us in our grandchildren's lives.

I am desperately trying to get everything ready for our trip to California on the 28th. I have noticed that as I get older I want to get things done early. I don't like running around at the last minute. I want everything done and out of the way so I can leisurely take care of things. I got some clothes. (You must have new clothes for a vacation.) Now I am on the lookout for a bag to carry on the plane. No luck yesterday but I have not given up. The bag I want is out there. I just have to find it. Until then, I will keep looking.

Have a great weekend.

It's Been a Year

The party was a wonderful success. I still can't believe it's been a year. Serif knew she was the center of attention and loved every minute of it.

I have to admit that since I had given her the bear the night before, I had to stop by the store and get something for her. The baby had to have something to open up from her grammy on her birthDAY. I got her a cute little phone. She loved it. She was pressing buttons like mad.

Missy made her birthday cake. She did a fantastic job on it. It was beautiful and tasted great. Serif did a great job with the cake. Not too messy but messy enough. She did get it in her hair and on her parents. I'm sure she was wondering why everyone was sitting around watching her eat. She has no problem being the center of attention.

Shortly after Terry's family left, Tom and Patti arrived. Serif was so funny. Patti put the bag with her presents on the floor and while we were talking Serif pulled out one the the presents. It took a little encouragement but she learned how to open a present. She loved her presents from Uncle Tom and Tanta.

It was a wonderful evening with family. There was lots of love and laughter. What a wonderful way to celebrate the first year of a wonderful little girl.

Happy Birthday

Today my sweet grandbaby turns one year old. I cannot believe it. Where has the year gone? She is such a big girl now. She holds on to your finger and just walks you everywhere.

Last year at this time I was sitting and waiting to have my driver's license renewed. Everyone sitting around knew that my granddaughter was going to be born that afternoon. I was so scared/excited. I was worried about my darling daughter having a c-section and that everything with her and the baby would be okay and I was so excited about this new experience that was waiting for me. The experience of being a grandmother. I had no idea the love and happiness that the next year would bring me.

I followed the kids to the hospital. They got ahead of me for a little while, but luckily there were no cops around, and by doing a little 75-80 I caught up with them. Then began the waiting. Luckily I was able to be in the room with her before the c-section. The doctor was late so we all sat around and talked about how hungry Missy was. I remember standing out in front of the surgery with Terry while they were prepping Missy for her surgery. The doctor came out and I told him to take good care of MY baby. He just smiled and patted my shoulder and assured me that everything would be fine.

I hate waiting but everyone was so sweet. They brought a chair out for me to sit by the nursery so I could see the baby as soon as she came in. It wasn't long before I saw Terry arriving with my beautiful granddaughter. I could feel Patrick there with me as we looked at her for the first time. She was so beautiful.

I wasn't totally happy until I finally saw my baby. She was so happy as she held her baby. It was so wonderful to watch. They were both well. All my prayers had been answered.

It had been 28 years ago that I laid in a hospital bed in that very same hospital and given birth to my baby girl. I knew the happiness that Missy was feeling. I knew the love that she was feeling for this beautiful new baby that she was holding. Until that moment I had no idea that I could love a baby as much as I had loved Missy. I found out about a grandmother's love that day. It is strong and it is pure.

The only thing missing was my wonderful Patrick. I could feel his presence and I knew he was as proud and happy as I was. I see so much of Missy in Serif. I see so much of Patrick in Missy.

Last night I couldn't wait and I gave Serif her birthday present. It sounds very vain but I gave her a Grammy Bear. I went to make a bear and made it for her. I put my voice in it. I wanted her to know that I am close to her no matter what. That if something should ever happen to me, she will have that bear to remind her, not only of my voice, but the love that I have for her.

Tonight will be her first birthday cake. No cutting it up in small pieces for her. It will be the typical first birthday cake that is presented to the baby in celebration of her first year. She will be able to get her hands in it and eat or spread as she wants. We will all sit and remember last year at this time and say our prayers of thanksgiving.

Happy Birthday Serif. I love you.

Mother's Day

Oh my goodness. I can't believe it's been so long since I last blogged. I really need to get better about this.

I want to share my wonderful weekend. It was so fantastic. I have the greatest children and children-in-law in the whole world.

Saturday was spent sleeping in and then meeting my kids for a wonderful brunch.The food was delicious and everyone was in good spirits.

I can't tell you what it feels like to sit at the table and look around at your children all grown up. I felt such a wonderful sense of happiness and satisfaction. They have grown into such wonderful adults. People that I would be proud to have as friends not just my children. Sitting there looking at these young adults and thinking back to when they were growing up. All of the frustrations, heart aches and worry were so worth it. They have grown up to make their mother proud.

After a nice relaxing lunch, I went home to rest up for the adventure ahead of me. Yes I was going to baby sit so my wonderful daughter and son-in-law could have a romantic evening of dinner and ballet. I was ready to spend some quality time with my adoreable granddaughter. I got there early so mommy and daddy would get ready for their date. Granddaughter was a little fussy because of a couple of teeth that are coming through on top. So, of course, mommy gave her some tylenol to make her feel better. It worked. She was happy and fun by the time they left at 6:30.

We played with some toys and everything was going well. Suddenly she got hungry so we sat on the sofa and had some of her bottle. There she was half sitting with her head on my shoulder drinking her bottle. I was just chatting away with her, when I looked down and she was sound asleep. Already. Okay so I figured she would sleep a little and then we would play. I held her close and kissed on her and played with her fingers and toes. All the normal things you do when a baby is sleeping in your arms. The time passed and she wasn't waking up. So around 9:00 I laid on the sofa and snuggled her close. We both ended up asleep. She woke up around 11:00 and wanted some more bottle but never really woke up. She was still sleeping soundly when her mommy and daddy arrived home around 12:30. She slept almost the whole time I was babysitting. Of course she woke up shortly after I left so that she could keep mommy and daddy awake.

After such a busy evening, I had a very relaxing Sunday morning. I have been so bad about going to church lately. I defintely have to get myself back on track.

Sunday afternoon was spent with the whole family. It was so much fun. It always is when we all get together. We just visit and play games. Since my wonderful son couldn't make the party, he called to wish me a happy Mother's Day. Both of my children are so thoughtful.

We all brought food so there was plenty to eat. Beautiful granddaughter was the center fo attention. She was sleeping when I got there. It was so sweet when she woke up and just wanted her Grammy to hold her. Of course, I had to force myself to comply with her wishes. I love when she first wakes up. She is so cuddly and snuggly.

We went out to see the rest of the family. Soon she was fully awake and showing everyone what a great dancer she is. She is so cute to watch. She just bounces up and down and swings that little arm. She entertained us with her dancing for a while and then she furniture walked to the end of the coffee table and put her arms out to me. I put my hands out and as she started toward me I pulled them back a little. Before we knew it, she had taken 3 whole steps toward me. I can't believe that she walked to me. What a big girl she has become and my fantastic son-in-law got it all on tape. What a wonder Mother's Day present. It was so perfect. She didn't walk any more but I didn't care. That was all I needed.

As usual, my darling daughter gave me a very wonderful and thoughtful Mother's Day present. I love the Willow Tree Angels. She got me the "Thank You" one. That and a beautiful card that she wrote a very special message on. She got what she wanted. She made me cry. It was such a beautiful and thoughtful present. Between my grandbaby walking and my wonderful daughter, it was a perfect day.

On the way home, I stopped by the grocery store and did my weekly shopping. By the time I got home I was ready to relax and get ready for the week ahead. It was such a wonderful weekend. I am so blessed with my family.

Later, best friend called and we had our weekly granny chat. It's so fun to share all our news about our wonderful grandchildren. What a wonderful way to end a great weekend.

I hope that all of the mother's out there had a very special day yesterday. And for those of you who didn't have their mother's with them. Know that their love is with you always.

Easter

Anyone who knows me knows that I am a devout Christian. No I am not a "bible thumping" Christian. I am one of the quiet believers. I will talk about it if you ask, but I am not pushy about it. Many other Christians believe that is wrong but I'm pretty laid back about everything including my religion. I'm the type that as the debate is going on all around me, I just sit back and quietly believe. I have always believed.

I have had bad things happen to me in my life. The hardest was the death of my husband. I remember the pain so much. I had never realized that is was a physical pain. I felt the pain of my heart breaking. But during that time my faith kept me going. My husband was also a deeply religious man and I knew he was at peace.

I have been fortunate that I have so much more good than bad in my life. I believe it is very important to take time to say thank you during the good times. Everyone turns to God when things are bad, but do you stop and thank him every day for all the good things that are happening? I hope so. I believe that is very important.

So why am I on my soap box today? Because this is the holiest of times. This is Lent and Easter is approaching. Everyone is coloring their Easter eggs and getting their pretty new Easter outfits. I hope everyone will take a moment to say thank you for the candy and the new clothes. I hope that everyone will take a minute to remember why we are even having this celebration.

Here is something I heard the other day that you might enjoy as you eat your jelly beans you get from the Easter Bunny.

The Jelly Bean Prayer

Red is for the blood He gave
Green is for the grass He made
Yellow is for the sun so bright
Orange is for the edge of night
Black is for the sins we made
White is for the grace He gave
Purple is for His hour of sorrow
Pink is for our new tomorrow
A bag full of jelly beans colorful and sweet,
Is a prayer, is a promise, is a special treat
May the joy of Christ's resurrection
Fill your heart and bless your life

May you and your family have a very blessed Easter.

Flowers and Time Change

This time change has been killing me. I'm finally getting to a point where I can blog a little. Between lack of sleep and work I haven't been able to get back here.

I have the sweetest son in the whole world. He came on Monday and brought me the most beautiful flowers. They smell heavenly. The whole office smells. That and a lovely note was a wonderful surprise. We even had time to sit and chat a bit before I started feeling guilty about work. This is the first time he has visited me at work. It was great.

Then I got to get my sweet grandbaby after work and take her home with me. She fell asleep on the way home. Bosco was so surprised when he came in and found her there. He gave her a good once over though. Her parents came in a little later but they got to visit a little bit after she woke up. It was a nice visit. I sat her on the counter where her mother used to sit and gave her crackers. She is getting so big. She could walk if she wanted to but she's happy crawling right now.

Tuesday was a terrible day at work. Everything went wrong and I was so tired. The time change really caught up with me. I felt like I couldn't get anyone to call me back or answer my emails. Maybe they were all feeling as yucky as I was. Luckily I made it through the day without doing too much damage and went home to go to bed early. A good night's sleep has done wonders for me.

Today is a much better day. I love days that I feel like I'm accomplishing something. Right or wrong I'm getting things done. Things are hitting the fan over some decisions that I have been told to make concerning conferences but I think I'm safe. Only time will tell.

Well back to work. Tonight is a go home and relax night. Nothing exciting except knitting and petting the dog. I have to admit night's like that can be very enjoyable. I think I may be getting old or something.

Grandchildren

I so love being a grandmother. I can't tell you the pleasure and joy that little girl brings me. I highly recommend grandmotherhood to everyone.

I got to pick sweet grandbaby up from school yesterday. She was so excited to see me. It just made my heart leap for joy. She crashed on the way home. After we got home and everything unloaded I got her out of her car seat and held her while she slept. I love doing that. When she woke up she was such a hungry baby. I cannot believe what a difference there is in her eating since she had the tubes put in her ears. After that was play time. She is at such a great age. I know the next stage will be great too but I am cherishing this one.

She was interested in something on the television and stood there all by herself for ages without even realizing it. Once she gets her confidence up there is going to be no stopping her.

Sunday she gets to come to my house while her mommy and daddy go to the ballet. I am so excited. I need to stock up on grandbaby foods to keep at my house. Now that she eats big people food I get to make dinners for her. This is going to be so much fun.

Of course Bosco is still not sure what to think of her. I'm not sure how he will feel now that she is moving around more. It's going to be interesting to see how the two of them get along as she gets bigger. I will definitely keep you posted.

Right now I am concentrating on the fact that it's Friday and I get to sleep in tomorrow mornig. I am so ready for that. Plus must clean for grandbaby's arrival. There's a busy weekend ahead.

Plus don't forget to change your clocks!

My Daddy

Today is my father's birthday. He would have been 83 years old.

He was raised in Beatrice, Nebraska. He had a great childhood. One that our children will never have. He was in farm country and had dogs and horses. He had a bull dog that he loved and grew up with him. He got Pal when he was five years old. Pal died the year Daddy went to college.

His father was the sheriff of Beatrice. Daddy was a popular guy. He played football, was on the swimming team and in the drama club. He loved to sing and dance. He was an acolyte and very involved in the church. He was a happy go lucky guy. My Grandma liked to tell the story about how he got in trouble for not coming fast enough when she called him. He was instructed to come immediately when she called no matter what. So the next time she called him, he rode his horse into the kitchen telling her he didn't want to take the time to get off.

He was working at the bakery in town when my mother went to collect a bill for the trucking company she worked for. Apparently it was love at first sight for him. He bet his best friend, who was working ther with him, that he would marry that girl. They dated and became engaged shortly before he left to join the Marine Corps. He was a member of the Second Marine division and fought in the Pacific. When he returned, my mother and her mother met him in Oregon and they were married.

They ended back in Lincoln with my father going to college and working part time. When I came along, he decided to go back into the service. He joined the army and shortly went to Officer's Training School. My father was one of the last mustangs. That is a person who works his way up from an enlisted man to an officer. After getting his bars, he went to flight school. He loved flying. Either helicopter or fixed wing. You could always see when things were getting to him but once he went flying, espcially his night flights, he came back a different person. He always said it was a wonderful experience. You leave your problems on the ground and up there it's only you and God.

During his career, he served in Korea and Vietnam. Those were hard times. He loved his family and hated being away from us. One of my earliest memories was getting up early in the morning with just him and having our morning "coffee". Mine was a drop of coffee in my milk. At that time we would sit and discuss all the affairs of the world. We had fun. We had serious talks. We laughed. This was special our time. The last time I had this with my father was the day I got married.

My father was a gifted leader. His men admired him and would follow him anywhere. Many a time one of his men would come up to me and tell me what a wonderful man he was. That he would follow my father to "hell and back" if he asked him to. I know that my father never asked his men to do something he himself would not do. I know of a couple of missions that he did in Vietnam that he wouldn't ask his men to do because of the risk.

The military was not the only thing that was my father. In fact, it was only a part of him. He was a very personable person. People were drawn to him. Especially children. He would listen to each one and they knew that he cared about what they had to say. He had a patience and a childlike quality that broke down that adult/child barrier. My counsins were so jealous of my father. They loved him so much and wanted him to be their father. In fact my cousin called my father when he was accepted into West Point before he called his own father. His heart was big and there was room for everyone. My children were fortunate to have been able to spend time with him.

He was a loving husband to my mother. They were together for 47 years. They had a wonderful life together and my father cared for her up until the day she died in his arms. He was lost without her. She was his love and his anchor.

On March 26, 1998, my father collapsed in the doctor's office. He was rushed to the hospital but he held on until my daughter and I arrived. It was hard seeing him lying there hooked up to all those machines. I took his hand and told him it was okay to go to be with my mother. He squeezed my hand. He waited until we had left the room and then he died and went to be with my mother.

There was a memorial service held for him at the Army Retirement Center that he lived. He broke the record of the number of people attending. He had made many friends and touched many lives in his life. He was a man that believed in God, country and family. He loved a party and enjoyed life to the fullest. He thought that if you slept past 6:00 am you had slept half your life away. He loved to laugh and to sing. He was always singing to us. He loved to play golf and he loved football. He was a great influence on me and his grandchildren. We all better for having had him in our lives.

Happy Birthday Daddy! We miss you.

Modern Medicine

Sweet grandbaby is doing so much better after her ear surgery. They took her in on Monday and had tubes put in her ears. She was such a trooper. I am so proud of her.

Bright and early on Monday morning I arrived at my DD's house to find a sweet grandbaby all ready to go. She was in much better shape than mommy. A mother has to worry. This is her baby. I have to admit that Grammy was a bit worried too. The poor baby had not eaten since 2:00 am but she was good about that. She did suck on her sippy cup and that empty sound was terrible. Her Grandmother showed up too. We were all there to entertain our precious girl. Of course everyone was very impressed with her. They were running an hour behind but Grandbaby took it totally in stride. Mommy and Daddy got to go back with her while both the grandmother's waited. It really wasn't long before they showed up with a sleeping baby in Daddy's arms. Grandmother had to go back to work but we three, with sleeping baby in tow, headed out to breakfast. About half way through breakfast baby woke up and Mommy's mood brightened. Sweet Grandbaby was hungry and managed to eat some breakfast with us. She just wasn't sure what had happened to her.

After a great breakfast we all headed out to go shopping for Grandbaby. I found a couple of cute outfits and two wooden puzzles for her. Mommy and Daddy got her a couple of outfits and her Easter outfit. The Easter outfit it precious and she is going to look great on Easter morning. Then Mommy and Daddy threw in a new toy and we all headed home. Once home, Daddy handed Grandbaby to me and she immediately laid her head on my shoulder and went to sleep. There was nothing for a Grammy to do but hold her while she slept. Such a hard chore but I proved up to it. She woke up with a smile and ready to play some. Later DS brought over pizza for everyone so he could visit with Grandbaby. She definitely enjoyed the attention.

That night I got a call from BF. This poor woman has been through so much and now she is having to take on her parents and their financial problems. Her mother is in early stages of dementia and her father is just trying to cope. They have gotten themselves into a terrible financial problems. So BF's job is straighten everything out and get them on the right track. All of this on top of not feeling well is hard on her. She's such a wonderful person and I have depended on her many times through the last few years. I am so sorry she is having to watch her parents go down like this. I miss my parents terribly but I am thankful that they both were themselves up to the end. At least she has her wonderful grandbabies to help keep her spirits up. We do enjoy sharing stories about our precious grandbabies.

Daddy's Girls

Happy St. Patrick's Day. This is a bad day for me. St. Patrick's day was always a big deal for my father. He was a proud Irishman. He taught be to be proud of my Irish heritage. He pushed it so hard that I would forget that I have some Polish in me too. He taught me about leprechauns. My mother would get so mad when he and I would see leprechaun's dancing in the fire. She never saw them. My father had a big impact on my life. I miss him very much.

Last night I went over to Missy and Terry's to babysit. It turned out that Terry was not going out but asked me to stay and take care of Serif so he could do some work. Boy was that a bad idea. That little girl was determined to be with her daddy. There was nothing I could do to make her happy. She never cries like that when I take care of her. Usually we have a great time and she doesn't even notice her parents aren't there. But I guess knowing that her daddy was in the house was all it took. She would scream until he came into the room and got her. Once he picked her up everything was great and she was happy as a lark. When I left she was on the sofa with Terry happy as could be chewing on his big toe.

I am so ready for the weekend. I want to relax and veg. That's what I usually do anyway. Maybe a little house work but mainly just relax. It's been a busy week. I love Saturdays because that's the one morning that I don't have an alarm getting me up. I love that waking up on my own and then sitting around reading the paper and enjoying my coffee. I am definitely ready.

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Reunions

Today was full of mixed feelings. Missy and I went to lunch with the group from our old office. It was so strange to see them all again. It had been about a year and a half since we had all last been together. Many things had happened in that time. Everyone had found new jobs (since the company closed), babies were born and we were all older. But it was also very bitter sweet.

I came to this company 3 months after Patrick died. I have to admit that the first 6 months of my employment there I was in a total fog. It was one of the hardest times in my life and the people there were my lifesavers. Missy worked there also and that helped a lot. It gave me a reason to get up in the morning. Something to face every day. Plus getting a paycheck was a necessity Especially since I was trying to recover from the bankruptcy. It was scary because other than working with Patrick, I had not had a job for almost 24 years. People aren't crazy about hiring someone who worked for their husband. They have a tendency to think that you kept your job by sleeping with the boss. Okay I did but I was also good at what I did. Anyway, because of Missy, they were willing to take a chance on me. I like to think I proved them right and gradually took over most of the office duties. I loved the people I worked with and they became more like family. I count each and everyone of them wonderful friends that I cherish dearly. Not at all like my job today.

The job I have today I got because I was qualified and capable of doing the work. They knew I could do the work and I proved them right by not only doing the job but taking on extra responsibilities. I also love the people I work with and look forward to going to work every morning but they are not my family. They are people that I work with and I enjoy their company. There is not the connection I had with the other company. When I leave work, I leave all that behind and go to my home and family.

So lunch was happy and sad. Very mixed emotions. I have to admit that it felt good to go back to my office and job. I've been there for almost a year and a half and I belong there. I'm very comfortable there.

Last night I got to visit with Serif. She is getting so big. She actually put her hand on my mouth and yelled at me. I believe she was telling me to be quiet. Can you believe that? Of course it worked.

Well that's it for now. I'm going to try to get up and exercise in the morning but no promises. It's been cool in the mornings lately and great sleeping weather. Since I'm not sick any more I really have no excuse but knowing me I'll find something.

Pleasant dreams.